OILBLOBOSPHERE!

Get the Farce On for Larsson - To the Promised Land we Go!

2010-03-04T11:50:00.006-07:00

I'd be surprised if anyone at all reads this (hi mang!), but just breaking the defunctedness to address the trade deadline very very briefly.

Lubo, Grebs, Staios: all gone by deadline.

Souray, Smid: both out with injuries.

Prognosis: The Fall for Hall is more than official, it's just a bout a done deal.

My only hope is that The Oilers suck eggs hard enough next year to grab Larrson, basically a once in a generation talent on the blue.

That leaves the Oilers with a ridiculously enticing core of young players to grow with. Hey, if you're going to tank, tank hard and fast and get it done with. None of this "build a playoff team on the fly while rebuilding" nonsense. Just raze the whole rotting structure to the ground. You can try to put it support beams, replace the cabinets, but in the end a shithole is a shithole. Get rid of it. Start fresh.

Speaking of structures, how about that new Arena? Weird that there would be a rebuild of talented youth that reaches it's most competitive (and possible Cup winning) years might just coincide with a shiny bright Arena to house them, isn't it?

Anyway:

Hemsky
Penner
Horcoff

nice core of vets if we keep them

Gagner
Eberle
MPS
Hall
Larsson

nice group of high draft picks

Hartikaanen
Lander
Plante
Nash

up and comers

Fill that out with some hardworking vets and you got yourself a team.

So, really, if it means another few years of terrible hockey, why not? I'm used to it anyway, at least now I'll know I have something to look forward to!

Right?

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I've abandoned my blog!

2008-11-22T23:04:00.004-07:00

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I've abandoned my blog!

I've abandoned my team!

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Decent first 20, Oilers are winning near as much as they're losing and even at this sad clip finish up at the end of the season with what? 96 points?

That's playoffs, baby.

But I swear to Christ if they go deaf I'm sending them away.

Playing Games

2008-11-04T10:14:00.003-07:00

You know how when you were first learning the game of love? The more the object of your passion ignored you, the harder you'd try?

Yeah, you know. Sucker.

Well, it seems as if the more I ignore the Oilers the better they perform. Yes, as an individual fan of course I wield that much power.

Right?

This time for sure

2008-10-30T12:50:00.006-06:00

Predators, Oilers...someone's gotta win.

I predict the Oilers to win huge. With the Hugest goals anyone has ever seen. Huge saves, too.

Gedmonton!

(woops, wrong photo...fixed.)

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Stop Reading the Internets!

2008-10-26T14:06:00.006-06:00

Are you an Edmonton Oiler?

Then what are you doing reading the blogs? Seriously, this shit'll mess you up. If this was how I checked in on my performance I'd go crawl in a hole somewhere and never come out again. Even the fair stuff can be brutal.

When you have to perform at the top of your game, highs and lows can be killer. Reading that fans are disappointed and angry isn't going to help you "even out your game", it's only going to plant doubt in your head. On the other side of the coin, buying into your own press about "how great you are" screws you the other way around. You stop giving it the same try.

Unless you're Zach Stortini, that is. Apparently, according to Oilers PR and David Staples, you either don't know how to read or you're too stupid to figure out the power button on your laptop. I have a cartoon coming for you, by the way.

I know, it's fun to google your name and see what people are saying, or maybe those Covered in Oil guys have something funny up, or (most likely) you just want to see what your score is on the Hot Off, but please:

GET OFF THE COMPUTER TUBES!

Focus on your family, your health and having fun.

Forget about stats (even joking about it while mic'd up killed Reasoner's numbers), and stop squeezing your sticks.

Remember the end of last season? You guys just went out there, kicked ass and didn't even bother with taking names, you had nothing to lose. Maybe that should be your approach again. Sure, it's important to win every game you can because of all the games you'll lose, but grinding them out is going to wear you down faster than gravel on skin (I've wiped out way too many times, I know what it's like to pick the stones and sand out of your own quivering flesh wounds).

Have some fun.

If you must read these frikken blogs then don't internalize this garbage.

It's just a game. I know you're competitive and that's great, but keep feeling frustration and that's all your body will accept when you strap on those pads. You'll already have lost the game.

Look at Gretzky the player vs Greztky the coach, man.

'Nuff said.

What News Cold Wind?

2008-10-25T16:21:00.008-06:00

A wind blows in from the west, sometimes peppered with rain, sometimes burdened with icy chips of snow, and following along with it will come news of either victory or defeat at the hands of the thrice damned Canucks.

Tonight we discover the mettle of our lads from Edmonton. Tonight we see if there are deeper wells of strength and determination than hither we have observed on the ice sheets of October. This night, our boys will fight to hold their heads high after demolishing an ever unworthy foe in godless Vancouver.

Our prayers go with you, Sons of Petroleum, Princes of Oil. They go fighting the bitter yowlings of a tempest blown, full of sound and fury, but like those bastards of the coastal game, signifying...nothing. Our wishes scale the cold rock of stormy mountain, descend the black depths of shadowed vale. They stop in for a cup of Cinnamon Dolce Latte at Starbucks, but ever to go, to go forward to the arena.

Like seers of another, more mystical age, we will look deep into our magic pools, spying the events as they occur while demonic voices sound in our ears, interpreting the play we shall witness unfold before us.

We will know of your highs and lowes, of your moments of shame and pinnacles of greatness.

Fare thee well, warriors, and return anon.

Victorious.

***UPDATE***

Inglorious.

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The Coming Storm

2008-10-24T13:53:00.012-06:00

There's a storm brewing, true believers, and it's looking to be a mess.

Players who have been or are out 6 games in:

Sheldon Souray
Sam Gagner
Fernando Pisani
Shawn Horcoff
Steve Staios (non-injured, out for family reasons)

Player who hasn't been in:

Ales Hemsky

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Can the Edmonton Oilers reasonably compete when six of the expected top performers aren't even in the line-up half the time? I know it's early, but if this club has shown me anything over the past couple of years it's that injuries are going to happen.

Have the Oilers gotten this under their collective belt early, or is it just an indication of things to come? Is it bad luck, training, playing philosophy? What ever it is, there have been too many injuries taking out players on a team that already looks ineffective and sluggish.

While the 4-0-0 start was exciting, I'm sure everyone can agree that it didn't look like the Oilers deserved those *wins, but they pulled them out anyway.

To be fair, with Hemsky and Horcoff out last year, the young guys stepped up and everyone took their game to the next level giving us fans that nice little winning streak to tease us all summer. What would you do if you were Craig MacTavish on Saturday?

Sit Hemsky?

Let him play out the "first month blues"?

Forget salary and put the right players on the right lines in the right positions instead of forcing the entire team to be the square peg?

Never, ever, ever play MacIntyre and Stortini on the same line again?

Look, that Brodziak, Stortini, Glencross line was lightning in a bottle and I'm sure it's tempting to think you can get that again with a few blends, but let's face it: GlenX was the straw that stirred that particular drink.

Anyway, a day off for the Oilers, let's hope they find their legs.

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*they probably deserved the Calgary tilt, but only after that abysmal first period.

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Aavaalaanche!

2008-10-23T16:28:00.004-06:00

Natural Disasters vs. Ecological Disasters
7:30pm MST
Sportsnet, CHED

After a game where it looked like everyone on the team spent the night before partying on NyQuil and Alka-Seltzer, let's hope the Edmonton Oilers get some jump in their step for tonight's tilt against the Colorado Avalanche. In Denver, Colorado - where the oxygen is both rarefied and scarce....

Something tells me this isn't going to be as easy as it sounds, especially if Hemsky is still a no-show. Opinion Alert! Kids, if you've been surfing the nets and are looking for real Edmonton Oilers news, there is one and only one official source for all your Edmonton Oilers content, and this ain't it. Alert Over.

What's with Hemsky? Is he still injured? Did the surgery affect his confidence and/or ability to dangle and wrist the puck? He's been slow out there, and although he has 4 assists he's just been average and barely that. Is it an illness? Did he catch mono? What gives?

I mean, I can relate to phoning it in, and after a few years of making millions, money would no longer be motivation to perform so I feel for the guy and I hope what's going on is just temporary. If it's not physical, well, maybe Horc's psychologist can help out but something's very off-kilter here. What with Staios' family issue and the Oilers' poor performance last night, I can't help but wonder if something happened to take the wind out of this club.

Well, here's hoping for the best for this squad. If they actually pull out a win, maybe it'll look a little something like this:

Loxy Makes A Good point

2008-10-22T13:04:00.006-06:00

Remember when Loxy and Grabia did that podcast?

You don't? Well, that's understandable. It was posted over a year ago with a few technical difficulties and then there was never any follow-up. It's too bad, too, because it was a beaut. Sure, a little rough around the edges, but for a first attempt it did all right.

In the comments of the "attention grab" post below, Loxy mentioned a YouTube debut. Now, I'll be honest, you don't want to see me in video (isn't print bad enough?), but we all know Lox is easy on the eyes.

What there's room for here, and I've tossed the concept around with friends, is an expanded media element to all this interminable "blogging". Personally, I'd love for Grabia and Loxy to to team up again and offer quick, 5 or ten minute musings on the Oilers and whatever. I'd love to see someone take up the YouTube route and do some video blogging/discussion.

Instead of reading about some of the things that happened at the bar while watching Pay-Per-View, why not record it, edit it down to the gems and post it the next day as a game follow up? You could have quick man on the street interviews, crazy fan interviews, hell, phone up bloggers across the world and get some opinions, explanations, etc.

On a further note, I know when I first started speedboating around the computer tubes I was mystified by all the tech terms relating to stats. Still am! A beginners guide somewhere would likely get a lot of attention, be fun to compile and help out a lot of fans, thereby raising the quality of discussion above "saw him good".

And now I've used up my alotted thinking time for the day. Back to BDSM jokes with Jabba the Hutt....

Look at me!

2008-10-22T02:45:00.005-06:00

Hey you. Yes, you, the person reading this sentence right here.

No, the other one.

Whatever.

Listen, if what you read here isn't making you throw up a little in your mouth on a regular basis, I'm extending an invitation.

That's right, an invitation.

Just simply click over there <---------

And become a True Believer.

If you're like me, you don't want to miss a thing I write.

That is, if you're super cool enough...

Right?

(there's also the rss feed if you scroll down a bit)
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A Quick Story

2008-10-21T15:23:00.013-06:00

In my third stint as a career alcoholic, I found myself drinking at Joey's on Jasper Avenue. What can I say? Home was few blocks away and the eye candy was in full effect.

Should we jump back before going forward? hmmm...Okay, let's do that. Let's take a trip into the distant past where we find ourselves on Whyte Avenue, home of the trendily damned. My first stint of dissolution was at the perennial Old Strathcona hotel, or "the Strat". That and alleys. And alone at home.

Fast forward ten years and I was at the Commercial Hotel (the Commie, Blues on Whyte) just about every single frakking night drinking piss beer and getting an education on the blues. I call this Phase Two. I'd occasionally wander over to the Black Dog but really, from where I was coming from, they were all just pretty kids trying to look dirty and "keep it real". Except me and my friends, who were totally different and completely awesome and kept it even real-er....

Right.

Back to the Story

So here I was at Joey Tomatoes, flirting with the bartendress and with the thought of hopping over to Red Star Pub when who should walk in but Ryan Smyth! Smytty, even.

I was, at the time, in a phase of disinterest with hockey and if it weren't for the girl I had been dating, probably wouldn't have even noticed him. But as it was I did notice, and since I was slightly drunk I decided to get his autograph for her.

Now let me pause here a moment and say this:

If anyone ever thinks of doing that, don't. Just Don't.

As soon as I reached his table where he had just sat down, I already felt like a grade-A creep. Then I asked for his Hancock and felt even smarmier. His wife glared at me and I probably shrunk about two feet. What was I thinking?

But you know what? Smyth smiled, said sure, and proceeded to give me his time, his attention and his autograph. Here I am a grown man interrupting his evening with his wife, and Ryan Smyth treats me with respect and cordiality.

Oilers play the Avs on Thursday, which put me in mind of Grabia's piece he wrote last year about Smyth's Return. A year later and I find those same old feelings sprouting up again. Even though he plays for "the enemy" and tens of thousands of fans seem to equate him with CFP or Brickboy, personally I'll be rooting for him. Not for his team but for him.

In my books, Smyth is the kind of guy the league should be imminently proud of and from both my personal experience and everything I've read about him, Edmonton should be proud that we once had this guy representing our city.

Good Luck Smytty.

And thanks for the autograph. It was a hit.

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Content!

2008-10-21T02:24:00.010-06:00

As in, stuff.

Not to be confused with stuffed. Me want food.

People can get all the cutting edge content they need right here on the Oilers official Website

No, what I'm talking about here is "content", Oilers Style™. In fact, I'm not the one talking about it all, but others are. Others like Alan Watt and J.J. Hebert as interviewed by David Staples.

If you like cray-zay, you'll looove this article.

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Warning! Apropo of nothing, Star Wars is my official filler for this post!

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And now for something that actually does makes me content. Andy Grabia -of Battle of Alberta- has posted a great article concerning honours done to Mr. Joey Moss.

You know what makes a community great? The people, that's what. And if a corporation that spends 100 million dollars a year to put a product on the ice can engender some of that good community spirit, then good on 'em.

But they're not getting my 17 bucks a shot for Pay-Per-View this year. That's right. As small as my action is, I'm taking it nonetheless. As Princess Leia is so fond of saying, "If money is all you care about, then that's exactly what you'll receive."

Only in this case they won't. And they're not anything like Han Solo. So analogies aren't my strong suit.

Who knew?

In my ridiculous opinion, the Oilers PR department screwed up royally on this whole issue and until I'm a gruntled customer again I'll listen to Stauffer and his newly neutered blandness, or better yet: find some illicit Live Blogging to read, since Everyone knows it takes the place of actually watching the game, and in no way is Live Blogging a fan crafted companion to the game, making it more enjoyable for everyone involved. Not at all.

My eyes just rolled out of my skull from all that eye rolling.

So, dear true believers, you all look fantastic from down here on the dusty floor. All four of you.

How about that original Star Wars trailer?

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So Long Mirtle

2008-10-20T11:36:00.003-06:00

He's packing his bags

He's strolling outta town

He's got a new gig

Remember that movie Falling Down?

Michael Douglas lost his cool

He shot a guy in the knee

He stole all the guns

And James Mirtle's drinking tea

With the folks at SBNation

He'll be starting up their blogs

All things Hockey Related

If you're good, you've got a job

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You see he's recruiting all kinds of writers

Who dig New Media and the like

So if you love your laundry

Start clicking left and right

So long Long Jim Mirtle

May eagles fly you high

Save you from flowing lavas

And steaming Orcish pies

Ride on, write on, right on

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If anyone wants to submit me for a Governor General's or something, it'll be an honour just to be nominated.

If you ever read the OILBLOBOSPHERE....

2008-10-20T02:05:00.015-06:00

...then this is a MUST READ. Oh yeah, it's just that good. Well, it's pretty good. It's alright. Of interest? um...tell you what, it's there, it exists, and your eyes can slide over the words if you have nothing better to do...

1. If you want to be added to my fancy blogroll, then make your case (in other words, just tell me)

2. Speaking of fancy blogrolls, the astute among you will have noticed that the sidebar has been radically updated. Now with more stuff!

3. Now with ScarJo.

4. This is post 100, huzzah!

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In Oilers news:

1. The Dave Berry Holy Crap!-a-thon continues with mindbogglingly more and more people adding their two cents. Hit CiO to get updates on the ever increasing coverage.

2. Steve MacIntyre. Awesome.

3. I don't get why people are still saying Dustin Penner is fat. He's quicker than ever and had a great start to the season.

4. Souray injured. Seriously? (yes, and don't call me Shirley)

5. Sam Cogliano, Steaming Nilsson, Garon 'standing tall to make the save' when he was flat on his back...just a few gems from CBC's broadcast of Saturday night's game.

6. Hot Gossip: A couple weeks ago I saw Tom Gilbert entering the Sushi joint on Jasper and 109th. Hand to God, I said, "Heyyy! uh...Awesome!" He smiled and waved like a pro.

7. 4-0-0! Enjoy it. Ut-ut-ut! No reality checks today, just enjoy it.

Enjoy it.

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Covered In Oil Blogger Booted from Game! (Now with Updates)

2008-10-18T12:40:00.013-06:00

As a Fan, I guess I bleed Corporation?

Check for the update below...

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By now, most of you who happen by the OILBLOBOSPHERE! know about THIS.

I've already made my comments at Dave Staples' blog and on CiO so I won't repeat myself, but I will say that I hope Oilogosphere writers whom I respect and visit daily don't cheap out and keep silent on the issue to cover their own asses in hopes of getting their own Golden Press Ticket in the future. There's something to be said for looking out for Number One while silently scooting the remains of your colleague under the bus. What's said is: coward.

To the Edmonton Oilers Organization: stupid stupid stupid.

This story is spreading like wildfire.

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As an aside, I made the mistake of checking out reaction at HFBoards. Can someone please tell me how the myth and meme that "bloggers" want to be "journalists" got started? What a joke.

I hear this repeated on radio, see it on TV and and I can't grasp how someone who might glance over a site like mine would ever think I'm a frustrated writer who's trying to make the grade. Jebus! I'm just an average fan with rudimentary computer skills.

Guys like Grabia, DMFB, Mirtle...you know, actual writers who already get paid for it? These guys aren't blogging for their writing careers, they're doing for the fun.

And this past event is leaving a sour taste in everyone's mouth.

Anyway, to all you idiots out there: the majority of fan blogs out there are for one purpose alone: having fun and expressing an opinion you can't find in MSM. Please clue in.

**UPDATE**

Check this out, it's worth the few minutes. Bob Costas talks about bloggers and the internet. Bluster galore.

Segment 1:

Segment 2:

New Jersey, those devils

2008-10-07T12:14:00.002-06:00

The Edmonton Oilers are releasing their 3rd jersey and I think I just messed my pants in fanboy joy.

Just watch the video, folks:

What do you think?

Oilers Season Preview! With Links! (Did I Mention the Links?)

2008-09-11T21:38:00.027-06:00

What a difference a year makes.

Last year at this time I was getting myself all geared up for countless games of heartbreak and sorrow. I was expecting my hopes to be crushed like so many nuts in 80’s teen movies (always hilarious). But, like Chet in Weird Science, secretly I was probably loving it, too. That pain never actually materialized.

Oh sure, the Torres and Stoll show was pretty frustrating. Seeing Souray play a quarter of the season was a let-down, and keeping Roloson in net far past his due date out of loyalty, well…it’s something you live with as a fan. This year Garon likely gets starting position and we'll see if he can take the sustained pressure.

And that leads us to the shootouts, those glorious shootouts and their even better precursors: 4 on 4 overtime. The Oilers only had so many because they couldn’t hang on to a lead, but still, high drama and top-notch entertainment for any hockey fan.

So, while my predictions of suck pretty much came true for last season, something happened I (or anyone else) did not expect. The Rise of Youth.

And that brings us to this year’s Ruminations for a Portending Season.

A First Glance

This year the Edmonton Oilers go into Training Camp with less holes than any other year I can remember in my adult life. Two years ago fans were worried about a thin and inexperienced Defensive squad, last year it was Forward depth and ability. This year it’s a Tough Guy and odds and ends (LH top-line winger, anyone?). But overall, Team Oilers hasn’t looked this good since the Fresh Prince sat on his throne in Bel-Aire (yo holmes, smell ya later) and bangs were better sprayed in the upright position (that’s what she said).

GM Kevin Lowe (who has sincle been bumped up to be replaced by Steve Tambellini) started off early and strong with the backing of new, improved owner, Daryl Katz (honest to god billionaire Drug Lord). Shooting off players who have promising careers, but didn’t fit with Edmonton plans anymore, Matt Greene and Jarrett Stoll (Mr. Rachel Hunter) found themselves down in the land of flesh and plastic, new pieces of the LA Kings, and in return we got Lubomir Visnovsky, a smallish, but excellent Dman to play on a top PP line with a rehabbed Sheldon Souray. Together, with skilled feeds from Ales Hemsky, squirrely moves from a young Sam (The Hobbit) Gagner, and smart decision maker Shawn Horcoff, that PP unit is gonna smack up some bitches, bitch!

Next out was Raffi Torres (#5 1st round, 2000)...and allegedly his, er...nose -snif sniff if you know what I mean- in an odd play for Gilbert Bule. Gilbert Bru-Who? You say? Well, that’s what I said, anyway. Gilby, we’ll call him, was chosen 6th overall in the 2005 NHL Entry Draft. If Sidney Crosby wasn’t stealing the limelight that year, Brule probably would’ve been the #1 Canadian pick in that draft. For reals. He had promise, but was rumoured to have been poorly used by the Blue Jackets and never lived up to the potential he showed and that Columbus was hoping to get out of him.

At any rate, will he factor into the Oilers line up on opening day? Unlikely, but he’ll be getting a chance to regain his skill and edge in the AHL this year and probably get more than a cup of coffee as the season rolls along. All in all, if he can get back into his game, this will have been a genius trade by Lowe.

Next up was the loss of Joni Pitkanen. As a fan it was hard to really like the guy. He seems to have the personality of a limp sardine, but he’s a beauty skater and knows how to put up points. He was traded to Carolina (and subsequently signed there) and back our way came 2006 Stanley Cup Champion and insane warrior Erik Cole. This is a man who played in the Finals with a broken neck! He not only held his own last year, but was a plus player on a struggling team. He’s smart, fired-up and will add skill, grit, and experience on whatever forward line he finds himself on.

As off-season fans know, The Edmonton Oilers also tried to sign Marian Hossa, but ultimately failed as he opted to sign for less money on an almost indestructible Detroit Red Wings team. In the process fans lost newcomer Curtis Glencross, that goddam dink, to the Calgary Falmes. He signed for more than he’s worth and will play on at least a third line, but more power to him. Some people think he’s a no-good, turncoat traitor, but not me. Nope, not me…

And here we find ourselves, TC a few days away and the Oilers roster pretty much decided on already. There are maybe two spots in contention for a whole squadron of talented up and comers in the Edmonton Oilers system all vying for a slim shot at the NHL. It’ll be interesting to see who makes it and who breaks a limb trying.

What to look for this season:

Youth is the Truth Forsooth

Sam Gagner, Andrew Cogliano, Robert Nilsson, Kyle Brodziak, Tom Gilbert (D), Denis Grebeshkov(D), Ladislav Smid(D), Marc Pouliot.

Get to know this group of jail-bait. All under 25, all up and coming names in the NHL and all on one team. Each one of them took so many steps forward last season, that even if they take a step back with the old “sophomore jinx” they’ll still be players. On that front alone, the Oilers will be worth watching. How many of the names on that list are going to full-on break out this season? Granted, most of them will be playing tougher minutes/reduced minutes this year, but it’s going to be a riot to see the development of these kids. Who says MacT can't develop youth?

Older, Bolder, Colder

Shawn Horcoff, Sheldon Souray(D), Erik Cole, Fernando Pisani, Ethan Moreau, Steve Staios(D), Lubomir Visnovsky(D)

These guys are the dirty over thirties your momma warned you about. They bring huge experience to the table and are just starting to get the bitter angry strength that eventually becomes Old Man Power. Real life hero and walking miracle Fernando Pisani is just one part of a core group of highly intelligent men on this Oilers team. And that’s where other teams are going to have to watch out and pray to Gary Bettman when facing them. Shawn Horcoff is possibly the smartest man in hockey today (Chelios deserves a runner up here), and all of these guys see the game extremely well. Yeah, Souray can look like a pylon, but he’s also a hell of a lot better than his reputation. Ask the numbers guys to prove it. With numbers. They can. If Ethan “I hate milk” Moreau can keep his glass and sawdust limbs intact, then we’ve got a mean sonnufabitch to anchor a ridiculously decent fourth line.

Hemmer and the Dust

Dustin Penner is fat. There, I said it. Fat contract, fat body. Here’s hoping he’s actually gotten in shape to, you know, earn his millions? Last year it was just embarrassing watching him huffing and puffing , always a few steps behind the action and then crawling over the boards back to the bench where he was once again embraced (and maybe just a little fondled) by what I presume was…a Big Mac or something.

Ales Hemsky. Ales Hemsky has a scar on his neck. He was sliced open by a beer bottle in a bar fight.

That’s cred.

(not Ales Hemsky)

He still doesn’t have the LH winger he needs, but is surrounded by enough talent this season that he is GOING TO BLOW US ALL AWAY. Last year I said he would hit 90 points. He fell short (injury bug hit the Oilers like a muthafu**er), but this year, baby. This year.

Without a word of a lie, I will set up a personal scenario here. I was watching the January 4, 2007 game (Dallas vs. Oilers). Edmonton had just blown a huge lead and the clock was winding down. With seconds left, the net empty, the Oilers were trying to tie a 5-4 game to get to overtime. My buddy and I were drinking a gallon of red wine (classy) and he predicted Hemsky would tie it up.

“There’s no way they’re going to get that goal!” I shouted like an angry drunk fan, “Especially not Hemsky!”

“And what if he does?”

“If Hemsky scores, I will personally drive down the road to the rink, I will find Ales Hemsky and I will get down on my knees and I will suck his dick! I'll put it in my mouth.”

One, I was drunk. Two, there were about 20 seconds left in the game. Three, homerotica is always funny.

And then this happened:

True to my word, I gave that amazing player the night of his life.

Well, actually I just screamed a lot in disbelief and got progressively more drunk and professed my undying love to my girlfriend. (That’s right, I’ve got a girlfriend, wanna fight about it?)

Anyway, Ales Hemsky. Helluva player.

So, the final analysis is this:

In the Northwest Division, it's going to be Edmonton and Calgary vying for top spot. Colorado with Thornton is still good, but age, man, it happens to us all (watches yellowed leaf float gently to the sundappled earth below), Vancouver sucks, and the oversized Mild have lost their way.

In the Western Conference playoff seeds, Edmonton finishes 6th or 7th. The Oilers are on the rise, but there's a couple years to go before they absolutely DOMINATE the NHL. Not one, not four, two. Maybe three. Book it, people. Write it down with pen.

And I’m done with this junk. I’m out of here. Maybe there’ll be a part two, and maybe this is it for your Oilers Season Preview.

Which will it be? Tune in...to find out!.

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The Votes Are In!

2008-08-26T15:33:00.007-06:00

Well, after an exhaustive voting process, the results are in. Although a few perusers (and contributers to the Oilogosphere) would take the hit and dutifully pleasure both of the ladies in question, most commenters preferred Scarlett Johannson (pictured here):

Over Natalie Portman, who apparently is less desirable than her counterpart. Here's a picture of the loser here:

Hey, no judgments, Oilogosphere. I mean, like, whatever, right?

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Hot or Hot

2008-08-11T15:21:00.006-06:00

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In keeping with an important theme started here in the past week, I've decided to lay a question before the public. A question, o mighty reader, that has been perplexing me for too long! To whit:

Who's hotter? Curvaceous Scarlett Johansson or Sultry Natalie Portman?

It is of the ages!

But place a comment here and let the decision be made...for good and all!

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Hot Summer Days

2008-08-08T13:25:00.004-06:00

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Well, it's piping hot outside. Fat guys making their own gravy hot. The Olympics started today, apparently and it's lucky 08-08-08. Go bet the life savings, how can it possibly go wrong?? Actually, keep that money in your pocket. If you're like me, you'll need to save every shekel for an HD upgrade for the upcoming season.

HD, people. You'll see more of the play, in crisper, sharper detail. Blood? More droplety. Teeth on the ice? You'll know when the time comes. Weird amounts of make-up on the commentators? You bet.

Anyway, I guess I'm just excited.

Above: Two compelling reasons to watch that Boleyn movie.

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What, I'm not posty enough for you?

2008-08-06T10:38:00.005-06:00

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Some blogs that do top-notch jobs find things to post about all off-season. To them I say: Thank You!

Seriously.

But this blog is not one of those. This most blobby blog will resume the closer we get to the season, but for now, my wee friends, it's summer. And that means girls aren't wearing a heck of a lot and patios are open and there's plenty of places to pass out after drinking ridiculous amounts of honey brown. What does it all mean?

Go outside and play.

We still have a few weeks of summer, so I plan on enjoying it.

Get Ready to Rock Out With Your...Toques On

2008-07-17T12:49:00.010-06:00

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I got a tip the other day to check out the CBC's Hockey Anthem Challenge and so I did.

Specifically, it was a tip to give a listen to this one:

And I dig it! But mostly I dig it after listening to some of the other pieces that were even more generic. Which in a contest like this is kind of a must. It has to appeal to a big chunk of differing demographics, I guess, so you can't get too crazy with it if you want to win. This piece is pretty good, though, all limitations considering.

Here's what Steve Dodd out of (spits!) Calgary has to say about his own work:

I think this theme has it all - a nod to the past with a main melody using a horn section, a rockin' band, memorable, and it can be broken down to usable parts for voice over, commercial breaks, etc. At 1:15 the main theme is revisited in a dramatic minor key which will also work very well for the show. I wrote it, and played everything. Can't you hear Ron and Grapes introing a game while you listen? Thanks CBC for the opportunity. Play hard!

Play hard indeed.

But any way you slice it, CBC lost out huge with the Original Theme.

How can you top that, really in today's work-a-day world where everyone is all about "layering sound" and creating "sonic walls" and our musicians are all too cool to rock out a huge, snappy, sing a long anthem that everyone can relate to and belt out when they're drunk on winning and sweet booze.

Anyway, if you have a small amount of musical creativity, write something up. You never know who'll win. Maybe some hard rocking Canadiana sounds, maybe a Middle Eastern Zethyr beat. Native American drumming?

The Hockey world's your oyster but something tells me horns and guitar are the order of the day. Every day. In Canada. At Night. Hockey Night.

Also, Oilers did stuff with trades and signings.

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Hossa? Nossa!

2008-07-02T10:49:00.003-06:00

Well, there goes that thought experiment.

How many hours and effort were spent by Oilers fans across the city busy doing math for the first time since High School, trying to fit a reported 9 million dollar salary into the cap?

Now it's being reported 1 year a shade over 7 million to Detroit.

Personally, I have mixed feelings, just as I did when went to bed last night. On the one hand, we won't be offering a 40 year deal at 380 million to a 29 year old, on the other hand...no Hossa.

But them's the breaks and I'll be watching the now underwhelming Katz press conference in about a half hour just to see what we see.

Hossa!

Out with the Young, in with the Old!

2008-06-30T08:29:00.006-06:00

Well, I can't say I'm surprised, but it will be sad to see Stoll and Greene go. Two young players who might end up being the best players hockey has ever seen. Ever.

Well, maybe not, but in comes Vish, and I guess everyone's expecting Pitkanen to head out later today. He's an odd duck. I mean a really weird bird who probably won't ever fit in easily with any North American team. Too bad. His apparent lack of heart will probably end up killing him as blood ceases to flow into his brain and nourish his various body parts.

heh, heh....ha?

Anyway, Jarett Stoll left town the way a player should, so kudos to him (are you listening, Thoreson? No, I suppose you're not.) Here's what he had to say:

"I'm obviously happy, but it's also a bittersweet feeling," he said. "I had a lot of great memories and great years in Edmonton. I'll always be fond of that and fond of those times.
I'm from close by (Saskatchewan)and I have a lot of family and friends that supported me. The organization was great, the fans were great. The support for the team in Edmonton was unbelievable. For me to be a part of that for six years, I couldn't have asked for anything more than that.
It's a great organization, I had a lot of fun there, and it's sad that it didn't work out, it's definitely sad leaving Edmonton and all the great times I've had there, but this is a new chapter in my life and I have to move forward now."
It's hard to say he's surprised when his name was attached to every trade rumour that came down the pike, but he did think he'd be getting another chance to prove himself in Edmonton.
"It did catch me off guard a little bit,"he said. "Obviously I heard all the talk, it's been going on for a while, and I kind of prepared myself a little bit, just in case it did happen. But it's still shocking and surprising.
But pretty quickly you realize that you have to move on -there's a new team and a new organization that you're part of, someone that wants you. I'm excited about that. I'm very excited to be with the Kings. I know they're going in the right direction. They have a great young core and I want to be part of that."
Stoll said it's tough leaving Edmonton on a downer, knowing the last impression fans here have of him was the tentative and unproductive shadow of the player he still believes he can be.
"It's unfortunate that the organization felt that way, that they had to move me. That's fine, that's the way they think and that's the business side of the game.
I definitely wish it could have worked out and I could have rebounded and had a great year and proved a lot of people wrong. That's the kind of person I am. I know, looking back at last year, that I can be a better player. That's what my whole focus was on this summer.
"I know how I can play and I'm confident in my game and what I can bring. I'll just bring that to another team and another organization now."
On the bright side, he doesn't even have to pack.
"I live 10 minutes from the Kings practice rink," he said. "It worked out really well if it had to happen at all. I'm a little bit still in shock, but I'm happy.
I wish Edmonton all the best."

-ROBERT TYCHKOWSKI , Sun Media

I don't have any quotes from Greene, but I did find this picture that I photoshopped only slightly for minimal dramatic effect. I'll always remember Greene's beauty first (and only?) goal, and the way he straight armed CheeChoo. Adequate times, man. Adequate times.

So, better minds than this one are analyzing this move in hockey blogs across the Oilogosphere, so check it out, leave your two cents and see those pennies ripped to shreds by the ravenous hoards.

Have fun!

---

In other news, at least there's one Torres who earns his monies. Spain's Fernando Torres chipped the ball over German goalkeeper Jens Lehmann during the 33rd minute to score the only goal of yesterday's Euro 2008 championship game in Vienna.

Fernando. Torres. hmm...

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Razmataz!

2008-03-25T11:35:00.004-06:00

So how about them Oilers, hey?

This has been just a beauty run for the boys and no matter how it turns out, good times.

See what I'm doing there? I'm being "smart". I'm hedging my bets. I'm not letting that little spark of excitement and hope grow to large for fear of being dashed to the hard cold earth in a bloody, crushing fall.

As the stat boys keep telling me, that's my inevitable end if I allow any runaway optimism to get the best of me.

Sounds like those stat boys are a pile of fun at a party, doesn't it?

I joke, I joke.

The truth (even if I don't want to admit it to myself) is this:

I AM SO CRAZY EXCITED ABOUT THIS TEAM RIGHT NOW!

I mean, come on! How can you have a pulse, call yourself a fan, and not be ridiculously pumped up and excited?

Yes, we might eat the next few games, or just miss the playoffs by a goal or two, but this is a legendary run, isn't it? This gives serious hope for the future, even if the rookies all get buried under the sophomore curse, we have a killer team gelling up here.

This feels like the 80's all over again. And if that feeling is just for this brief period of time, so be it!

In other words, stop being so goddam cautious. Hope, believe, crash and burn...that's what bring a fan is all about. If you want something safe, join a coffee clutch, or race worms or something. For me, I'm cheering. I'm going to suck every last drop of awesomeness from this time.

I'm going to live on the sweet nectar of vicarious victories while they last, and it's going to be sooo good.

So good.

Nothing Gold Can Stay - Or Copper and Blue, Anyway

2008-03-11T01:22:00.006-06:00

Oilers Nation, I fear thee.

Is it just me, or does it seem strange to have what appears to be an overly slick, target-marketed, oh-so-hip new blog on the block that tries to lure readers in with it's sometimes clever, mostly frat-house type humour and surprisingly good contributions by one Robin Brownlee?

Personally, I'm your basic sad, lonely soul spending too much time in isolation typing out half cogent, meaningless semi-diatribes. Isn't that what blogging's all about, people?

Isn't it!?

No one cool actually keeps a blog about a basement team in the also-ran major Sports league in North America. And certainly no one with an o'erweening, apparently unslakeable thirst for bombardingly obvious advertisers (and advertiser's money)...or at least so upfront about it, anyway.

All that being said, and despite my suspicions that the blog is completely a pro attempt at inserting a money-making cash cow into a homespun little community (gots to cash in on those million BoA hits!), I do suggest checking it out, and daily at that.

After all, they give away tickets!

***INSTANT MENTAL UPDATE***

Note to drunk self: Is Oilers Nation equivalent to Gian Ghomeshi?

Haunting Memories

2008-03-03T00:25:00.003-07:00

Grabia over at Battle of Alberta posted a video of the "Log Driver's Waltz", an NFB short that is forever imbedded in some part of my frontal lobe, forever dictating unknown facets of my "personality".

It got me to thinking of other gems of Canadiana (or in this case, Edmontoniana...) and this piece of iTV filler is like Memory Crack for anyone who grew up in Browntown in the 80's:

Foppalanche! And what to do about glass bones...

2008-02-25T18:23:00.004-07:00

So Peter Forsberg goes to Colorado, iffy foot and all. Good for them or bad for them? A desperation move to get back into the playoffs? Whatever.

More interesting to me is the chatter the past week or so of Lowe possibly pursuing Marion Hossa. The Good: a finisher for Hemsky. The Bad: A crazy, long-term contract that would shackle us for years. Oh wait, don't we already have one of those?

The Ugly: It's doubtful he'd ever sign, so it's all moot.

---

Moreau. An okay player who brought a little more intensity to a floundering, aimless club. In the handful of games he played, that is.

Is it time for a new Captain?

Yes, yes it is.

There is no joy in Mudville

2008-02-20T16:03:00.001-07:00

Total Tuesday Predator Punch-Up

2008-02-19T11:53:00.003-07:00

Go Killer!

Edmonton Oilers at Nashville Predators
6pm MST
Sportsnet/CHED

After the game against Vancouver, I'm ready for anything from this seemingly rejuvenated Oilers squad.

What we'll probably get tonight? My prediction:

El Snooze Fest

My guess is the Oilers are going to evaluate the effects of a Highly Physical Game and decide taking a billion penalties to prove how "team tough" they are isn't worth the price of losing the match.

Just a guess.

So we're in the stretch and only the most wide-eyed optimists really believe we have any chance at all of making the playoffs.

Am I one of them?

For sure.

Oilers 5 - Preds 2

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Total Dick T's...Unfulfilled Promise...

2008-02-01T15:03:00.000-07:00

It's official:

Kevin Lowe is a rookie junkie. What was my first clue?

Christ, here's the link:

From the Oilers' PR department, I assume...

The Edmonton Oilers have obtained rookie forward Curtis Glencross from the Columbus Blue Jackets in exchange for defenceman Dick Tarnstrom.

The 6’1”, 195 pound left winger from Kindersley, Saskatchewan has scored six goals and six assists for 12 points in 36 games with the Blue Jackets this season and is tied for 20th in scoring among NHL rookies. He is +3 with 25 penalty minutes and has netted one powerplay goal and one game-winning goal.

Now in his first full NHL season, the 25-year-old (December 28, 1982), forward made his NHL debut with the Anaheim Ducks on January 13, 2007 versus Colorado and scored his first career NHL goal in his debut against the Avalanche. He played two games with Anaheim in 2006-07 before being traded to Columbus on January 26, 2007. He was scoreless in seven games with the Blue Jackets last season.

As well as his nine NHL games with Columbus and Anaheim in 2006-07, Glencross combined to score 25-26-51 with 127 penalty minutes in 60 American Hockey League games with Syracuse and Portland.

A member of the Alberta Junior Hockey League’s Brook Bandits in 2001-02, he played two seasons of collegiate hockey at the University of Alaska-Anchorage in 2002-03 and 2003-04, before turning pro with Anaheim’s AHL affiliate in Cincinnati. He has scored 48-40-88 with 281 PIM in 159 career AHL games.

---

Ah, the old "hometown boy". While I agree Tarmstrom has had his ups and downs, I certainly felt better with him on the ice than the Minus Crew. Well, whaddya know, we're sellers.

Playoffs or Bust

2008-01-31T11:20:00.000-07:00

So I hear we have to win 22 games to make the playoffs.

That's it?

After watching the Oilers vs the San Jose Sharks the other night how can we NOT make it? We were dominant in every way, on every shift out there. The fire and spirit of this team never takes a day off.

No changes to the line-up are necessary, and it's great the Souray is placed on IR, I know what they're doing. Last game of the season, they'll bring him out to score ten goals and then we'll coast through the Second Season and watch as our powerhouse team of NHL Players drink sweet nectar from Lord Stanley's Cup and we, as fans who stuck by them all along, share in the glory.

22 games...why not offer us a challenge?

Swag-A-Riffic! Versus tries something new

2008-01-25T17:21:00.000-07:00

I like hockey and I like free stuff. Having few moral objections to "selling out" for "knick-knacks", I'm giving VERSUS a plug for the NHL All-Star game on Sunday at 6pm Eastern. Don't forget the Skills Competition on Saturday and the Young Stars Game immediately after!

Anything else?

VERSUS!

A Stroll Through The Oilogosphere - Part 2

2008-01-25T16:15:00.001-07:00

A Stroll Through The Oilogosphere - Part 1

2008-01-24T00:41:00.000-07:00

Click on the image for a larger (possibly more legible) view.

The Lazy Game Day Preview

2008-01-17T10:14:00.000-07:00

Edmonton Oilers at Ovechkin Kapitals
5pm MST
Sportsnet West and 630 CHED

So we're off to play the Washington Capitals tonight. Thanks to NHL scheduling and that I'm too cheap to order Centre Ice, this will be the first time I've ever watched Alexander Ovechkin play live. Seeing as this road trip has been labelled "do or die" by just about everyone I know, read, or casually pass along the street, I've decided to just focus on Russian Hockey Player. But Go Oil, anyway.

I was asked to provide a quote for "Why The Oilers Will Win" by Ken at Japer's Rink. Here it is, along with some other Oilogosphere (not to be confused with OilBLOBosphere) quotes. Note how Shawn provides "analysis". What a chump.

Why The Oilers Will Win:

"As self-loathing Oilers fans (are there any other kinds, lately?), we believe the Edmonton Oilers will absolutely DESTROY the Washington Capitals in Thursday night's match-up. Why? Three words: Puppy Dog Eyes. After looking into the sad, sad faces of our young, floundering squad, the Caps hearts will be left broken and empty. We'll then go ahead and fill that void with goals, and plenty of them. Now who's crying? Nylander for one, but that's a whole other story. So stuff that in your pipes and smoke it you Washington fat cats, what with your smug Ovechkin having fanbase..." - Oilblobosphere

"[T]he Oilers already traded away their prize for finishing dead last this season so the Oilers don't have quite as much motivation to lose as the Caps." - The Real Deal Hockey

"Part of me wants to say karma after Nylander screwed Edmonton over and ended up in Washington. However, I actually like the Capitals and their very interactive owner. As a result I'll focus on where I think Edmonton has true advantages. First of all, both Oiler goaltenders have performed better than Kolzig this year. Garon especially is one of the hottest goalies in the league while Kolzig has struggled to regain his form. Edmonton has a better defensive core as well. The Caps have a couple of guys I'd love to see in the copper and blue (Green for one is outstanding) but 1-6 Edmonton has more depth. Up front there's no Ovechkin in the Oilers line-up, but a two-way forward group that includes Horcoff, Moreau and Pisani is a significant step ahead of the group in Washington. They should be much better at even strength and on the penalty kill, while Washington's forwards are more explosive and should be better on the power play. Finally, Edmonton has a veteran coach while the Caps are coached by an NHL rookie. - Oil Country, Ontario

Chris Pronger is SOO Over Edmonton or: How Can We Sleep While Our Beds Are Burning?

2008-01-16T18:26:00.000-07:00

I don't know how many of you caught this (probably everyone by the time you wake up tomorrow morning), but Chris Pronger was on the Jim Rome show today talking about good old Stabmonton.

Among the gems: "What didn't sit well with me was hearing about how they burned my furniture...how they burned my kid's crib...that didn't sit well with me..."

Uh...What the Hell?

I'll be the first to admit that Edmonton is a lot of things. Dirty, brown, cold, stabby...heck, we even indulge in a little bit of arson during Cup runs. But I mean, that's phone booths and shopping carts.

But to claim -on a Nationally Syndicated talk show- that fans in Edmonton broke into his house and burned his baby's crib?!

I repeat, What.The.Hell?

Doubtless people will be up in arms, news organizations will pick up the story and Pronger will face little to no repercussions for insulting an entire Megalopolis of over 1 million people.

Pronger also remarked that he wished the people of Edmonton could just "get over it" like he has, but he really doesn't see that happening.

Can someone actually be nominated for Douchebag of the Year two years running?

***Bedtime Update***

Jay in the comments sent in this link from the AOL Fanhouse. In it, Greg Wyshynski manages to split a hair.

Looks like this story'll have some traction. Can I say "debacle?" I'm saying it anyway. Debacle.

Attention Covered in Oil

2008-01-16T16:35:00.000-07:00

In an effort to inspire your writers, I did a quick websearch to get the ideas and creative juices flowing. Your readers humbly await your inevitable output.

The Morning After - A Bitter Pill to Swallow

2008-01-16T11:50:00.000-07:00

And in the end the Oilers went to their millionaire beds with tears in their eyes. It seems the alcohol fuelled celebration of their victory over the Calgary Flames resulted in two-day hangovers for most of the team, and the family men on the bench couldn't do enough to mitigate the damage. Moreau tried, but he couldn't carry his lethargic team to victory.

Thus ended the Oilers winning streak, and hopefully their apparent overconfidence in facing the worst team in the Western Conference. Give these boys a few wins and suddenly they start getting a mite too big for their britches!

So it's on the plane and off to the Southeast where fate awaits them.

Hey, if they can pull out three or four wins on this road-trip, then that's a good thing. Ideally the Oilers post 8 wins out of 10 (including this wrapped up homestand), pushing them up the standings into a possible fight for a playoff berth. If not, then call this season done and start planning for next year.

You stole my heart, and my 12 bucks

2008-01-14T17:13:00.000-07:00

This game preview comes at you a day early. So sue me. Don't actually sue me... please...

While the Oilers try to take a game from the Kings, completing a five game homestand sweep, the EIG will be lifting a few dollars from my wallet. Yes, I admit, I am one of the saps who says "yes" to my Shaw Box for Oilers Pay-Per-Views. I know I'm only encouraging further sub-standard productions from the Organization, and I know I'm often bitterly disappointed when the Oilers lose on PPV (I just PAID for that!?!), but in winter, I nest. That means I'm not willing to shell out for the cab home in freezing weather when I inevitably drink myself stupid while watching the game at BP's or whatever generic sports bar I end up in.

The Kings are having it rough this year, and if all goes well, they'll slumber while we pull a win out from under them. If all goes horribly, horribly wrong, we get thrashed like peasants when the Lords and Masters of Los Angeles wreak their mighty vengeance.

But a five game winning streak...wouldn't that be something?

Oilers host the Kings
7pm MST on Oilers PPV and 630 CHED

Laundry Day, or Hatfields vs McCoys

2008-01-13T12:13:00.000-07:00

Hope Never Faileth

2008-01-12T12:48:00.000-07:00

This in response to Pat's newest at BDHS:

Consider the fact that next season Greene will probably be solidly on his way to being a dependable player, if we make a deal with Gilbert and Pitkanen we're more solid on the back end than we've been since Pronger. Who knows? Smid may settle down, too. Staios and Souray provide the stability. (I never thought I'd say that about Souray, but he's been playing much better than my expectations)

Up front, Brodziak and Cogliano could take steps forward, so now we have (with Penner, Hemsky, and Horcoff) five highly skilled workers. Do we keep Stoll? I don't know, but better the devil that you know. Torres, Moreau and Reasoner are all solid guys.

Garon in net...you know, there is a chance we tear up the second half of the season.

Can we do it?

Most of our losses last half were still pretty close, just like the majority of our wins. With a relatively healthy squad, is it too crazy to think we could tilt the ice in our favor more often than not?

If we can learn to avoid the infamous 3rd period meltdown, we could be legitimate contenders.

I look for a steady climb this second half - in contrast to our free-fall last year after the trade deadline- and I wonder if Lowe will have to make a trade at all?

If things click and gel, do we have enough right now to make the playoffs?

If we do well enough before the All-Star game, SHOULD Lowe trade up? Will we need some experience to survive the playoffs should we make it that far?

Scorcoff an All-Star!

2008-01-10T10:51:00.001-07:00

Congratulations to Shawn Horcoff for making the All-Stars.

In other news, we play a team tonight that has been tearing it up lately. Their young guys have begun gelling, they've got a solid new goaltender and they're battling their way up in the standings.

Ladies and gentlemen: the Gretzky Coyotes.

This gives me hope. If a perennial bottom-dweller can start to make good, well, then I ask you, why not us?

With Lowetide pointing out that Smid and Grebs are playing together tonight, maybe Lowe and MacT decided to throw this one as a gift to their old buddy, who knows? One thing I do know, I'll be drinking beer.

Enjoy the game!

Phoenix Coyotes at Edmonton Oilers
7pm MST
Sportsnet West and 630 CHED

Grabia is God

2008-01-09T17:52:00.000-07:00

Go now, ye unwashed, and hearken unto the words of Grabia in this, His mighty piece of editorial power.

God's Words to your...Eyes

In other words, pretty good work, Andy.

As for the rest of you: [Spits!]

Edmonton CHUD-lers

2008-01-05T16:33:00.001-07:00

So Scared to Post

2007-12-04T12:16:00.000-07:00

Or talk above a whisper, or shut the door too hard, or feel too much happiness or optimism.

Must. Not. Upset. Streak.

Then again, we play Pittsburgh tomorrow, so all my caution may be moot. After three great games played by the Oilers, they actually get three wins! Did I just step into the door beside eternity or is this team actually starting to gel?

(careful...careful...)

The fiery, steady soul of Pisani has lit in the hearts of our team and we have glided on sweat and effort into second last place in the Northwest, relinquishing last place to those whores of Babylon, even the Calgary Flames.

So how do we bring that desire and confidence to bear on Sidney Crosby and the Homme himself, LeGG? With Hemsky out indefinitely can we rely on Cogliano, Thoreson and Nillson to try to fill that hole? It'll be a good thing when Gagner starts to fill out a bit. That or he learns to slip through and past defensemen like the tiny Martin St.Louis.

Pride in my team, though...so retro. So rad.

We're Playing Colorado...again?

2007-11-28T15:08:00.001-07:00

Colorado Avalanche at Edmonton Oilers
7:30pm MST
Sportsnet, 630 CHED

The good news is Edmonton has a chance to extend their winning streak to three whole games! A feat that the Oilers haven't accomplished since December of last year. The bad news is Colorado is in the midst of a twenty game losing streak and so will try to make easy pickings of us. Again.

Ryan Smith, Cogliano, Roloson, Sanderson = storylines.

Prediction:

Oil win it 4-3

Lots of Oil and BJ's for Everyone!

2007-11-26T15:18:00.000-07:00

Columbus Blue Jackets at Edmonton Oilers
7pm MST
Sportsnet West, 630 CHED

Riley Nash. Big Kid. Soft Hands. Physically Fit.

We almost have this guy in Dustin Penner. Almost. Honestly, I think Penner was completely shell-shocked by this past year of his life and he's just now starting to see where he wants to take his career. After winning the Stanley Cup with a juggernaut of a team, getting the chance to earn ridiculous amounts of money, and partying through the summer like it was 1999, can you blame him for coming in fat as hell and slowed down because he had to haul that sloppy ass up and down the ice?

I can't.

But lately, I've noticed the under-chin disappearing, and jawline and cheekbones pushing their way up out of his mountainous, fleshy mug. This is a good thing. I imagine he'll hit physical fitness by Christmas and in the past 5 or 6 games he's impressed me more and more.

For tonight, however, I'm looking forward to see if MacT matches him up against Nash. Who's checking Mike Peca tonight? Marty Reasoner? Seems like a good fit. I've heard over and over again how Reasoner's lost it, he's almost due for the farm, whatever. Blow it out your earhole. Reasoner is one of the guys on this Oilers squad who's getting it done night after night.

Sure, it's a little crazy putting him on the Shootout, and he's never going to the All-Stars, but he's what we need more than anything right now (besides goals), and that's dependable. Good old Marty.

Of note tonight: I'll be watching the play of Hejda tonight. I thought it was mistake not to sign him, and brilliant for Howson to nab him up. In point of fact, I think when Scotty left, the IQ at Oiler Headquarters dropped by half. I look for Columbus to be a contender in the next five years. Maybe not all the way to the Finals, but deep in the playoffs for sure.

Any other ramblings? Plenty. But I'm going to the game, so I'm signing off. If you see me on TV, I'm the guy with the gorgeous tits.

Prediction:

Oil - 5
BJ's - 3

and I get felt up.

The Wii is Strong

2007-11-13T10:15:00.000-07:00

I don't know when I'll be back...

Super Mario Galaxy has arrived and I'm getting ready to fight low-gravity battles, solve diabolical puzzles, and soar through space like Italian plumbers are meant to do. Besides, Peach keeps inviting me to the castle saying she has a very special present for me and every time I get there she's getting kidnapped again!

Make no mistake: I.Want.My.Present.

Oilers play tomorrow.

Moonlighting?

2007-11-10T12:32:00.000-07:00

Edmonton Oilers at Clagary Falmes
8pm (MST)
Hockey Night in Canada (CBC) and 630CHED

Both the Oilers and the Flames have lost their last four. So, even though both teams aren't doing so good, at least there's a losing skid to snap and whoever wins this one is likely going to go on and win a number of their next games. The Oilers have been playing well and losing, so their chances of grabbing this one looks pretty good, even though Mikka Kiprusoff has a pretty good record against us.

Goaltending/Defense
Personally, I think Roloson should sit this one. Sneering at a puck doesn't stop it, and right now I'm not sure his head is on right. Maybe bitter looks work, but all the same, why not start Garon tonight? I like Roli, but he looks stressed out. Then again, so would I if the help I was getting in front consisted of Grebeshkov and call-up Allan Rourke.

Leadership
I like the jump and energy that's building up again after losing steam just a few games into this season. With all our injuries, I think everyone was waiting for someone to step up and take the lead. Shawn Horcoff and Ales Hemsky finally grabbed the gauntlet and we've been doing better by inches in the past three outings. Torres has been surprisingly good and consistent, registering something like 10 of the 33 shots on Wednesday.

New Kids
Cogliano continues to amaze me with ability to crank his speed up to eleven and Brodziak is what he was supposed to be: dependable. Gagner has faded quite a bit, playing less minutes and doing less with them. I look for that to change tonight. Meanwhile Nillson obviously doesn't want that ticket back to Springfield, bringing his game with him Wednesday vs the Avs.

Hemsky on the PK?
Listening to Stauffer a couple days ago he made the case that Hemsky should play on the PK. Brownlee's big objection was, "I don't want to see Hemsky blocking shots". I'm actually on board with the idea of playing Hemsky on the PK once in a while. How will it affect the other team when they know one bad pass will likely equal giving up a short handed goal? It's not like the PK could get any worse, so why not give it a try? Hemsky doesn't have to block any shots, he just has to be on the ice for 30 seconds.

Scraps for the Flames
Anyway, Calgary under Keenan has played both phenomenally and horribly. It's like they're still trying to find their identity. I gotta hand it to Keenan, though. He seems like he's mellowed and this can only make him a more measured coach. Will Calgary settle into the right formula soon? God, I hope not. But after three coaches in as many years, you know all they're lacking is consistency.

Oil 3 - Flames 1

g'game

2007-11-07T22:17:00.000-07:00

Is it wrong to feel so right? We lost, but we got a point! It's like wonderful spring all over again.

So there we are, neck and neck on the shootout. Roli looks pretty weak. I'm no goalie, but even I knew what that first shot was going to be like before it happened. I was looking forward to seeing Roli remain unmoved, refusing to be fooled into overcommiting himself.

How wrong I was.

Poor Gagner. He should have stuck to his patented move. Instead, he tried to be a tricksy little hobbitses.

And one last note:

Reasoner!? On the shootout?

What.The.Hell.

Nillson? Cogliano? Do these skilled players names ring a bell? Ah well, Craig MacTavish went with his gut and his gut said Rolaids. So he sends out Reasoner.

But hey! A point!

If I'm MacT, this is how I feel right now...

2007-11-07T17:01:00.000-07:00

When they had a healthy team, I was thinking the Edmonton Oilers might just squeak their way into the playoffs. As it stands now, I wouldn't make that bet for a ten to one return.

How did we fall so far so fast? Most fingers point at EIG greed and Lowe incompetence. Those fingers would be wrong.

This is the guy responsible:

The rare "slender loris"

It's okay to hate him.

We're the 2006 Western Conference Champions!

2007-11-07T00:58:00.000-07:00

Edmonton Oilers at Colorado Avalanche
730pm (MST)
TSN and 630CHED

Yes, the Oilers have been losing but that doesn't change the fact that tonight they're turning it all around. Why? Because they're winners, dammit!

They're gonna win this one for all the poor, injured bastards sitting around with their thousand dollar bills scattered on the coffee table, just looking at all that money, thinking they'd trade it all, and everything in their bank accounts, just to get back on the ice again for the team.

And the fans.

Money can't give you a hug, after all (and I guess it can't make you heal any faster either). It can't cheer for you and it can't swat you on the bottom after a good play, can it?

That's why they're going to win. Millionaires who've never had to work three jobs just to buy their baby some medicine still know what it's like to earn a buck, and that's what OUR millionaires are going to do tonight!

Why?

Because they're winners.

Dear god...

Back into the Trenches

2007-11-05T09:46:00.001-07:00

Edmonton Oilers at Minnesota Wild
6pm (MST)
Sportsnet West and 630CHED

A few gaffes here and there have lost the battle more than once early in this season and it's hard to imagine that the Oilers can fix that up anytime soon. With injuries to both veterans and the younger kids alike decimating the Oilers line-up (we've even gone so far as to call up Young - remember him from last year?- from Springfield in order to bolster our suffering defense), if we by some miracle squeak a victory out of this it will only be because Minnesota somehow drops the ball in a major way.

Having said all that, I'm optimistic. In the last few games we've lost, we've at least lost well, which is something to take note of. The Edmonton Oilers have actually been playing well and perhaps it won't take much - a captain's return, maybe? to tilt the scales just that needed percentage.

The powerplay has been getting noticeably better and Cogliano continues to shine just as Horcoff and Hemsky are finally getting their legs back.

Gagner has disappeared a little, but has still been noticeable with some nice plays here and there. With the Wild's shutdown style of play I don't envision a whole lot of exciting breakaways, but then, you never can tell. That's why they actually, you know, play the games.

Oilers 3 Wild 2 (shootout victory)

***UPDATE***

Apparently I'm on crack as the Oil lose 5-2. That's the last time I consult you, magic 8-ball, isn't it?

Ask again later

Doh!

Predator..........s

2007-11-02T17:46:00.000-06:00

Nashville Predators at Edmonton Oilers tonight at 7pm MST.

Tonight is the night historians will say the Oilers turned the corner to become one of the greatest dynasties the world of sports has ever seen. The entire team will be referred to as the Great Ones by the upcoming generation and redefine what it means to be a man in the 21st century.

After winning 14 straight Stanley Cup Championships, grizzled veteran Sam Gagner will say, "The key was...the one thing that made it happen was...hey! Schremp, can you finish sharpening my skates for me? Okay, where was I?"

This, my friends, is the night that begins it all.

Oilers 5 - Wild 3

We have the technology...

2007-11-01T21:43:00.000-06:00

...we can rebuild him.

And just in time for February's trade deadline it would appear. After watching that endlessly disturbing replay on the old Pay-Per-View the other night coupled with the literally last minute loss to the Detroit Red Dinks what with all their "skill" and "experience" and "chemistry", as a fan, it can be said I'm in down a well. Sour gas for everyone.

When that goal hit, I uttered a Serpico level of serious "Fuck You" to the TV and found something more entertaining to occupy my time, like swallowing needles.

I agree, unnecessarily gross.

But!

And there's always a but...

This team appears to be coming together. Whether that translates into wins, or just a lot of well played losses, I don't know. What I do know is that I've seen vast improvement over the last few games and I'm not sure if stats would bear that out, but I'm willing to bet they would. Seriously. Five dollar bet.

All we can do at this point is see how it all plays out for the Oiler's in the month of November. I'm predicting four wins. Too optimistic?

Five dollars.

Oiler Killer

2007-10-23T11:51:00.000-06:00

Dear Craig MacTavish...

2007-10-20T22:47:00.001-06:00

BoA - The Keenan Year

2007-10-20T16:47:00.000-06:00

Edmonton Oilers vs Calgary "Lames"
8pm MST
Hockey Night in Canada (CBC)

I had a picture, but Blogger won't let me post anything right now. Anyway...

LT has a good pre-game up at his site, so I won't pretend to have anything substantive to add. This will be the first regular season match-up between two venomous, bloodthirsty arch-rivals, and the first with Mike Keenan at the helm for Calgary.

It should be interesting to see how our young kids play against a -um- actual NHL team loaded with veterans.

At any rate, I still predict a win. Torres stays on fire, Roloson makes unbelievable saves, and Greene sweeps sticks away left and right.

23-8 for the Oilers. No hat tricks.

uh...What?

2007-10-20T14:06:00.000-06:00

First, I've seen these guys. They don't actually look like this. I can only imagine that the concept is to one: terrify opposing teams who log onto our team roster page, and then two: attempt to impregnate them?

Yow. Whatever happened to re-takes?

Glove tap to Alana at hotoil.

El pequeño toro loco

2007-10-19T16:56:00.000-06:00

I am Desert Power

2007-10-18T15:52:00.000-06:00

Let me explain:

The Oilers will roast the Coyotes, but like the mythical Phoenix, who dies in fiery immolation, the Coyotes will rise from the bottom of the league after a few years of high draft picks. This may also be a myth.

Edmonton Oilers vs Phoenix Coyotes
8pm MST, Sportsnet West & 630 CHED

Prediction:

Oil win 8-3

Schremp with a hat trick, all assisted by Hemsky, who also scores a hat trick, all assisted by Schremp. Someone bleeds.

Natalie Portman makes you Read

2007-10-18T12:59:00.000-06:00

Tyler's got a great post up detailing his thoughts on the issue of media vs blog quality/accountability.

I also heard the Stauffer show the other day where they were discussing "bloggers" in a mostly negative light. Here's my beef:

How hard is it, really, to determine the difference between say a mc79 or Lowetide or Battle of Alberta, to that of the send-ups like Covered in Oiland Hot-Oil? Here at the OILBLOBOSPHERE! we rarely repeat any trade rumours, don't try to pass ourselves off as experts, and basically are just doing this the fun of it. At no point in time to do we even pretend to have any (journalistic or otherwise) integrity whatsoever. But for longevity of memory concerning issues like the proposed new Hockey Arena? Andy Grabia's your man. With over a million hits already, BOA is quickly becoming an influential voice concerning the EIG and the Edmonton Oilers.

Personally, I like the content on the great sites I mentioned above. I dig the analysis, thoughts and stats of IOF, and you'd be dumb not to get a kick out of BDHS. I could go on and mention the character and quality of a number of other Oiler sites, but I'm already belaboring the point.

What gets me is that while with one hand they disparage the "bloggers" (whom they don't seem able to distinguish from the rabid masses of HFBoard posters who invariably drown out any attempt at informed discussion - from the thoughtful essays of Lowetide) with the other they steal content. There's more than a few times I hear or read from the media the very same ideas that were first developed and presented by someone writing about it online. Always a few days later, of course...

OILBLOBOSPHERE! is a joke. We're mainly positive and silly and that about sums it up. We want nothing other than to entertain ourselves and if other people like it, that's cool, too. I don't think there's anyone who would ever make the mistake of taking us seriously.

Are we "bloggers"? No. That word is just plain stupid. We're just guys who work and goof around and post stuff when we have some time.

For Stauffer, et al to talk about us like we're idiot children who want to post every rumour they throw out as though it were fact is disingenuous at best and horribly uninformed and media stupid at worst.

Get it together guys. You actually get paid to do what you do.

Sincerely,

A long time listener, first time ranter

ps. Are you worried that one day a light will come on in some of these guys' heads and they'll form a better one-stop outlet than you can provide? With Dairy Queen as a sponsor? And consistent podcasts? And a radio deal?

pps. It'll never happen, so just relax already.

---

Goose Eggs

2007-10-16T14:02:00.000-06:00

"Whither the veterans?" one might ask, if one were a 17th century Duke of Foppingshire.

And I'd have to agree with his subtle, biting assessment of the Oilers offense 6 games in. With the Rookies carrying the water for this team, I hope this week in the desert brings clarity to the guys we're relying on to inch us toward that last playoff spot come spring. A peyote dreamwalk to re-discover their true essence, if you will.

However, chances are they're playing a round of golf, eating a few steak dinners, drinking a few, bedding a few and enjoying the simple melancholy of life. It's karma, neh?

Could it only have been a few weeks ago that the promise of a new season began? Is Pleasure Motors right and we're going to tank it hard yet again? Am I already in my koan phase of Oiler fandom this year?

Mu.

***UPDATE***

Think Gene Principe reads the blogs?

2007-10-10T20:53:00.000-06:00

Ice Battle in the Cloudy Waters* - A Giant Falls

2007-10-10T12:31:00.000-06:00

Edmonton Oilers vs. Minnesota Wild
6pm (MST)
TSN, 630CHED

This team traditionally owns us. You know what else was traditional? Seppuku. And with MacT calling up JFJ, presumably to protect Gagner, Cogliano and Hemsky from the Boggart Man, I fear a falling upon the sword tonight. With all the career-threatening hits that have already been laid out this season, I hope the rookies understand that tonight they really have to watch their backs. Literally.

We started out terribly on Monday against the Red Wings and were never quite able to dig ourselves out of the hole. Minnesota, known for it's vast landscape and tear-inducingly boring style of play will give our boys even less chances to recover from early gaffes, so the Oilers need to play a tight, disciplined game. With the Wild's neutral zone skill at shutting down rushes and their physical, frustrating tactics, it's going to be tough for our guys not to take a few bad penalties.

This is exactly what the Wild will hope for. Admiral Ackbar, your thoughts?

Precisely. So how does a team get inspired when they can't match up physically, has all the open ice shut down, and are basically playing in fear of their young stars getting crushed along the boards by a giant thug? I'm not sure, but hopefully MacTavish has the right jokes at the right time to keep this team positive.

After being blooded by the Wings, this young team realizes it's mortal, after all. It'll be interesting to see how they go forward with that extra bit of caution. I predict quick, short, accurate passes to get through the trap. I predict a lot of dump and chase. I predict a long game.

But above all, I predict a victory: 3-1 Oil

(Torres goes batshit crazy on Boogaard. Loses. Scores game winning goal.)

*the meaning of Minnesota in the Sioux language is 'Cloudy Waters'...and that's one to grow on.

Detroit Rock City - The Acid Test

2007-10-08T14:23:00.000-06:00

Edmonton Oilers vs Detroit Red Wings
5:30pm (MST)
Sportsnet West and 630 CHED

A lot of you would say I'm full of it when I say that tonight is the first REAL test for our young Oil.

San Jose and Philly are good teams - some might even say cup contenders - but neither of them brought their "A" game against the Oilers. Lidstrom, Hasek, Chelios, Rafalski are veterans who usually play well in their own barn and the Oilers know it. They're also a tight checking team and they won't give our boys the whole rink to play in like the Flyers did in the first period of their game.

It's also the first road game of the year.

Brodziak continues to REALLY impress me and is leading the team with 3 points (+3) and his line appears to be the real deal - who would have thought. Considering there's very little "gelling" happening this early in the season, being undefeated going into tonight should earn a little notice (maybe even respect) from the "NHL analysts" that were all saying the Oilers wouldn't make the playoffs.

Did I mention how much I liked Penner using the term "Oilers hockey" in his post-game interview the other night? It's almost like the Oilers have more going for them than a new dressing room - like confidence, youth, speed and a little perspective from an overtime loss in Detroit tonight.

You, Me and Everyone We Know

2007-10-06T00:00:00.000-06:00

Philadelphia Flyers vs Edmonton Oilers
6:00pm (MST)
Oilers Pay-Per-View and 630 CHED

Even more compelling than a Picard/Kirk match-up is tonight's bout featuring the dearly Departed Jason Smith and new Oilers captain, Ethan Moreau. Unfortunately Moreau's foot didn't get the memo.

At any rate, it's going to be an exercise in mastering manly emotions when I see Jason Smith faceplant an Oiler for the first time. I shudder at the prospect of "Torres from Thursday night" reacting to that possible eventuality.

It's the beginning of the Season and I'm as keyed up as if it were a deciding playoff game. Can the Oilers repeat the ridiculously excellent chaos of Opening Night? Will Lupul get a hat trick? How are we going to shut down Briere? Poorly, one would think.

A few things to look forward to in an otherwise bittersweet match-up:

1.Hemsky continuing his aggressive play and getting some points
2. Nillson relaxing and not freezing when he realizes he actually has a scoring chance
3. More Cogliano and Gagner
4. Stoll keeping the pressure on
5. Torres! Torres! Torres! A blitzkrieg of unrestrained, PCP-esque hostility
6. Penner to wake up
7. Reasoner continuing to impress with his mad skillz and sweet landing strip

One thing I'm not looking forward to is the inevitable boo-ing of Lupul. I think he was as poison for this team as the next beer swilling jerk, but he's gone, he had his tough times, let it go.

Souray and Greene did a pretty decent job shutting down SJ's big guns. Greene's immobilizing of Cheechoo was the highlight of his game and I hope we see more of it. Souray wasn't actually as bad as he looked. For the few gaffes he made, I noted quite a few smart plays and I have no doubt he's working to be more effective at his actual job of defense.

Sanderson, again...solid NHL player. He's comfortable on the ice and is a calming influence on the young guys. I'm one of the few who think he's a really good part of this roster, and if we can't have Jason Smith (and we can't) at least we can have the experience of Sanderson for the kids to draw on.

A crazy mix of former Oilers and Flyers on the ice tonight. There's only one symbol to really express the back and forth of it:

))<>((

My Prediction: 5-3 Oilers (Lupul with a hat trick-all assists from Briere)

GOILERS!!

Welcome to Oil Country, Enjoy Your Stay!

2007-10-04T10:56:00.000-06:00

Oh my God, we're back again
Brothers, sisters, everybody sing
Gonna bring the flavor, show you how
Gotta question for you better answer now

Am I original?
Yeah
Am I the only one?
Yeah
Am I sexual?
Yeah
You better rock your body right

Backstreet's back, alright
Alright!

-"Everybody" Backstreet Boys, 1997

---

OILERS vs SHARKS

7pm (MST)

Sportsnet West

So here we are. Game Day. We're a rebuilding team, despite the fact that no one in the Oiler's PR department is willing to acknowledge that fact (someone should let them know that Rexall is still going to sell out every game, not to worry). So yes, we're rebuilding and that means a couple years of young guys finding their stride, but like most of the starry eyed optimists in fan-dom, I still hope.

Can't a team rebuild and still make it to the playoffs? Once in the playoffs can a team surprise and go all the way?

Hope. It's beyond reason.

Another idea that seems unreasonable en papier is the belief that the Oilers will defeat the San Jose Sharks in tonight's match-up. Many analysts are favouring the Sharks to go all the way this year and win the Stanley Cup. They also predict the Oilers will tank once again, relegated to the basement of the league and thereby hand Brian 'rage-a-holic' Burke some "excellent picks".

I predict the Oilers to surprise. I predict Edmonton takes this game with authority, winning 6-4.

Horcoff, Hemsky (2), Brodziak, Moreau, Penner.

That's the fan side.

The realist in me is doubtful. The realist concedes to the fact that for this year, at least, instead of the Boys on the Bus, we have instead, the Backstreet Boys.

Lord preserve us...

Let the games begin!

2007-10-03T17:10:00.000-06:00

KKo'ggrixx was confused by the Yanks 'Iced Hockey'

Welcome to the North American opening of the NHL 2007-2008 Season. Ryan Smyth plays tonight, so in an act reminiscent of agreeing to hang out with your recent ex-girlfriend's new boyfriend, I'll be watching with a mixture of nostalgia and irrational rage.

O Blessed Season from now until New Year's...I have eggnog in hand, McKeen's handy, and the Sun's handsome sports pullout prepped and in....er...hand.

Golorado!

Edmonton vs. Alberta

2007-09-26T16:12:00.000-06:00

Looks like it's time to start pumping up the jam. This beat is Technotronic. In other words, Oilers play the Calgary, Alberta Flames tonight (7:30pm MST) and you can catch it glorious mono sound via the airwaves or internets. Are there any big questions to answer? Not really. It's about that time when we start seeing some major cuts to the roster, dropping bulk for a more svelte form, a fast and speedy and god help us - accident prone team.

That's my real concern at this stage in the game. I'm pretty much resigned to just praying we squeak into the playoffs, but can we please just have a healthy team this year?

please?

Anyway, I'm going out drinking at the Black Dog so this Oiler fan is missing the game in exchange for beer. Sweet honeyed, browned beer. Sweet black, bitter frothy, carmelized beer. Thin, weedy, last resort Mountain Crest-y beer. I'll drink it all.

Tomorrow I'm going to swear off drinking for good, make deals with the Almighty to end the pain, and generally face up to the fact that I'm not a kid anymore and my aging body will actually die one day.

But until then, beer!

Also: Flames suck and will lose. Horcoff with the game winner.

***INSTANT UPDATE***

Lowetide pulled the list of cuts from the Oilers site today.

Sebastian Bisallion (D)
Danny Syvret (D)
Bryan Young (D)
Troy Bodie (LW)
Fredrik Johansson (C)
Ryan O'Marra (RW)
Liam Reddox (LW)
Rob Schremp (C)
Slava Trukhno (LW)

Looks like Bucky has a team on his hands. So does Schremp get traded or simply fade away into obscurity?

Get Outta Town!

2007-09-23T19:40:00.000-06:00

And that's what I did. Holy Christ but I missed a lot.

Here's the quick and dirty:

Gagner: awesome. At least 9 games in regular season. At least.

Cogliano: slowly gaining some hardcore momentum. We need this guy to be a player and he might just step up. Maybe for a couple dozen games before he backslides, but it's looking good. The backsliding has nothing to do with facts, but everything to do with my sense of Constant Impending Doom as an Edmonton Oilers fan.

Hemsky: Sweet Jesus, I love you.

Schremp: Who?

Brodziak: You're doing so good you make me sick. But I want more.

Moreau: Stop getting injured! Hell!

Pouliot: A slow starter, and that's for goddam sure, but he has the potential to be a solid player. It'll be nice to have a couple more of those around...what have got to count on, like 4 other guys?

Sanderson: oh yeah, and Sanderson. He's an NHL player and it shows. Not the best guy on the ice, but so comfortable with the game it's almost pathetically reassuring.

Souray: I think yesterday's game tells us all we need to know about the coming season for Souray. Sooooo good. Sooooo bad.

Grebeshkov: I feel for the Russians. They got hit with capitalism without any inoculations and it's made anyone with an ounce of talent above their former komrades entitled, and dare I say it? a little lazy. I'm not saying they don't work hard, I mean...anyone who works up a sweat five days a week is kicking my ass all over town, but come on. You know what I mean.

Pitkanen: Did somebody say "tradebait"? Guy might become a star, but can we afford to wait? That seems to be the story of Joni's life, but really, does he have any strong chemistry with any of the lines he plays on?

Penner: I think we got the real deal. He's not expected to earn his money this year and he won't. Maybe not even next year. On that third year though. In the meantime he'll contribute in very excellent and entertaining ways, I'm sure. I like what I've heard on the ol' 630 dial. Gagner-Penner-Hemsky (or whatever order they're in) is going to be a great line.

---

There's more, but I'm out of fuel. Love the pre-season so far. Mirtle or mc79 or Lowetide posted a few weeks back talking about how teams perform in the pre-season is a pretty good indicator of how well -or not so well- they'll do in the Regular Season.

Ten more days until October 4th.

...and it just keeps getting better

2007-09-14T09:45:00.000-06:00

Joanne Ireland, you got those seductive words just pouring out:

Torres arrives in best shape of his career

"I was watching what I was eating and I didn't drink all summer. Not that that was a problem (...he hastened to add. -ed.), but I was getting up early and getting my workouts in," he said.

"I want to get my speed going and I want to get my playmaking ability up to par. I want to be peaking by game one.

"I'll be the first one to tell you I wasn't that dedicated before. I think I grew up a lot this summer," he continued.

"I stayed away from hanging out with people I shouldn't be hanging out with. I just got my act together. I'm 25. I want to play this game for another 10 years. I don't want to be one of those guys who plays till 30 because he didn't take care of himself."

There's a lot of buy-in from the team to open this season. Everyone seems to be hungry and almost scarily motivated. Could it be enough to jump a few slots into playoff position?

Hmm....what a strange emotion, it almost feels like...optimism?

This man is on our team

Now that's what I like to hear...

2007-09-14T00:40:00.000-06:00

From the Edmonton Journal:

Oilers' Off-Season Training Shows

There was a leanness in the face of Ales Hemsky that wasn't there before, even more hunger in Ethan Moreau's eyes.

Raffi Torres looks and sounds like a new man, Jarret Stoll hasn't had any post-concussion symptoms since May, and Steve Staios was impatient.

He wasn't alone, given that the Oilers have spent the past five months waiting for a chance to put last season behind them.

Souray didn't keep his admiration to himself:

"They're not just saying they're in good shape, they really are," said Sheldon Souray, glancing coyly over his shoulder.

Anyone going to watch training camp, or to the Joey Moss Cup on Sunday? I'd love hear impressions from first-hand observers on how the boys seem to play. A few more days until pre-season. It's here, everyone. It's here at last.

What The Fu*k!?

2007-09-14T00:29:00.000-06:00

Hey, remember that guy...what's his name...Ryan Smyth? Well, today he offers a sad, sinking feeling of betrayal to all the fans he left behind:

"Well, hopefully, I can be an Oiler killer," Smyth said Thursday after undergoing medical and physical tests at the Pepsi Center, the first official day of training camp...

Smyth and defenseman Scott Hannan, who signed a four-year, $18 million contract with the Avalanche on July 1, were among the NHL’s prized free-agent catches of the summer.

"It’s awesome. It’s great to be here," Smyth said. "I’ve been here for the last week. To come down here to the Pepsi Center to kick off the season is awesome. It’s a great feeling."

...huh.

.

***UPDATE***

Sac has his take over at BoA

Samwise Gangee

2007-09-13T17:39:00.000-06:00

Get used to this.

Well, except in one of our sick new uniforms. Today on the Team 1260 Kevin Lowe stated that the "door is wide open" for Sam Gagner to make the team and start his NHL career early.

To be fair, Lowe also said that he didn't want to push or rush any of our young guys, but he did compare him to Ales Hemsky, adding that young Samwise was stronger physically, and probably more able to adapt to the game than Hemsky at the same age (who they sent down for a needed year of development).

Not sure how to feel about this. On the one hand, if I'm a young player, I want to compete on the Big Stage. I'm going to play as hard as I can, but am I going to burn out? Will I handicap my future by not giving myself time to develop and grow into the game by playing on the farm for a season?

On the other hand, we're desperate.

Egads!

2007-09-13T13:18:00.001-06:00

I don't know if Battle of Alberta or Covered in Oil had it first, but they grabbed this nifty little scoop from someone on the HF boards today:

click for larger image

Half stripes? Piping? Damn Muties playing for our team? I don't know much, but I do know moderation. And I can safely say, in moderation, I hate these uniforms with a deep and abiding passion that will stay with me until the end of my days.

On the other hand, they could have been worse. Much worse.

Hitting the Links

2007-09-13T11:34:00.000-06:00

Pat at Black Dog Hates Skunks continues his Dante-esque descent into the Oilblogosphere Looking Glass, and it's not for the faint of heart.

In their State of the Union, Battle of Alberta celebrates 1 MILLION! hits, Grabia is still the most prolific retiree on earth, and the Sac is back.

The Hot Oil Hot Off is underway.

For some reason straight(ish) men turn into fashionistas when it comes to Hockey Jerseys and Covered in Oil is keeping on top of the new changes. The demasculating trend is aptly titled From the shadows of the CN Tower.

After a long hiatus these guys are back to posting and blogging. Good to have your lazy asses back.

And James Mirtle is polling the hoi polloi for predictions on where teams will finish in 07/08. Because knowing ahead of time is...fun?

As ever, Mudcrutch is making our heads spin (and getting questions read on Inside Sports), and Lowetide is setting us straight, like a good father should.

Upstarts talkin' hockey and the OILBLOBOSPHERE! simply add to the cacophony of also-rans sprinkled hither and yon across the internets...

Have I missed you? Let me know.

I love being kicked in the balls. Hard and repeatedly. And that's why I'm an Oiler's fan.

2007-09-12T11:59:00.000-06:00

Season Preview

If the Edmonton Oilers intend on being competitive this year, they need a few too many miracles. Raffi Torres, Shawn Horcoff, Ethan Moreau, and Ales Hemsky all need to have the year of their lives. Dustin Penner and Sheldon Souray need to earn at least half of what they'll be making, and guys like Matt Greene, Denis Grebeshkov and Joni Pitkanen have to step up to the plate and be at least competent, and Théoden has to ride until dawn. Also, everyone has to stay healthy for every.single.game. No love rashes.

So who's new:
Dustin Penner, Sheldon Souray, Joni Pitkanen, Robert Nilsson, Mathieu Garon, Geoff Sanderson, Denis Grebeshkov. Dick Tarnstrom returns to the fold once again.

Who's out:
Jason Smith, Ryan Smyth, Marc-Andre Bergeron, Jussi Markkanen, Joffrey Lupul, Toby Petersen, Brad Winchester, Petr Sykora. And we didn't sign Jan Hejda!?

Why you should watch:

Ales Hemsky. This could be the year for Ales Hemsky to put the dingle in the dangle and come out guns blazing as a certified Star. Brighter minds than mine are predicting a 90 point season from Ales, and with Shawn Horcoff (one of the smartest players on the ice in the NHL, period), and the 245lb Dustin Penner rounding out the line, we may just see something the Oilers haven't had in years: a killer power play. And that's what it has to be all about for the Oilers this season. You don't pay Sheldon Souray the Ryan Smyth money (contain...overpowering...rage) unless you plan to have him belting rubber at the opposing goalie's face all game. He's shit for defense (his position), so you draw as many penalties as you can and hope to God it all comes together.

Who'll step up:

My prediction is Patrick Thoreson pulls together his rookie year experience and comes out with a hard-on for goals. Thor was excellent last year and only needs to convert all the scoring chances he has proven to be skilled at creating.

Of interest:

Sam Gagner. The bright light of falling to the bottom six of the league this year was the Oilers' opportunity to draft this young player. Earning the MVP in the snoozer Super Series, Gagner showed quickness, drive, and pure hockey sense that will likely get him 9 games in the Big Show. The Oiler's are so desperate to fill forward holes right now ("San" Fernando Pisani is out indefintely with ulcerative colitis) that if he really shows up, little Samwise may find himself starting his NHL career a little too early.

Questions:

Will Raffi Torres settle down into something resembling consistency? Will Dwayne Roloson, at 37, be able to keep as sharp as he has been? Will it help to have Mathieu Garon waiting in the wings? Will Pisani be ready by Christmas? Will Pitkanen live up to his early promise and will Souray learn to skate?

What I'll predict:

On paper, Oilers finish anywhere between 12th-14th in the West. But what's paper but some kind of mashed up pulp? I say Oilers finish the season just squeaking into the playoffs, battling it out with the Vancouver Canucks, Luongo out due to a painful groin issue. After that, who knows? Sometimes this team can surprise you.

Why are hockey wives so worried about living in Edmonton?

Lost In the Dust of Time...

2007-09-11T15:06:00.000-06:00

Rusted, worn...forgotten. Banished in shame.

They have no more life and lie listlessly, dead. The Orbs of Power that once brought victory and skill to warriors of heart, now victim to the harsh ablation of pernicious time. Waiting, waiting for a hero to claim them as his own.

Once the secret strength of a Number One Defensemen, whose name we shall not name, they were relinquished on the field of battle - at the very cusp of what would have been our greatest triumph! - the energy that fed them grasped in tight knuckles, leading away, away to the Southlands, to the city that looks out upon the Great Ocean of Calm.

Who now possesses the key to energize these Orbs? A potent talisman, it needs only one to stand tall and step forward.

Stoll? Moreau? Horcoff? The Great Hemsky? Is there any among the so-called heroes of our day who can awaken the Glory of the Past?

Oh Ye, of Silvered Tongue...

2007-09-11T12:49:00.000-06:00

Patrick LaForge weighs in on Chris Pronger....again.

"It was a black bruise on the soul of the city," says Oilers president Patrick LaForge. "Everybody was into the win - or the near-win. So excited about it, so happy about it. That's nirvana, orgasmic, whatever you could think of, at its best.

"Canada's team, Canada's city ... everybody sharing in all that glory and recognition, only to have it taken away - to have it scurried out from under them - by a hockey player. How do you deal with it?

"It was mournful. It was anger. It was the Oilers' fault. It was the city's fault. It was the potholes. Everything became a finger-point. Maybe it was Chris Pronger's fault. But he couldn't be rounded up and put in the stockade, with rancid vegetables to throw at him.

"We didn't get our pound of flesh out of him."

Our pound of flesh? Forget about the fact that Merchant of Venice is one of the most politically incorrect plays ever written by Shakespeare, casting the villain as a greedy Jew, but what is this pound that Pronger supposedly owes us?

Sure, we got screwed over, but I do believe Lowe brokered a deal that would not only handicap us for 06-07, but right into this season as well.

The gist of the article that spawned the above quote is that Edmonton has a bad reputation around the league as a place to live and play hockey. Apparently the Oiler's organization are a bunch of vampires, unable to see their own reflections in the mirror. Ask any employer around town these days: treat your employees like crap and you'll find that the good workers will seek employment somewhere else. You'll be left with the inexperienced and the loyal (almost to a fault) who will stay because they believe in each other more than you.

Wake up, EIG. Wake up Lowe. If players are your most valuable resource, then stop frickin bad-mouthing them on their way out the door or you'll find yourselves at the bottom of the league.

Oh, wait...too late.

Golden Bears learn the Oilers Rookies good

2007-09-10T21:38:00.000-06:00

With a 2-1 victory, marking an 11-9 lead in the ongoing 20 year series (winning six of the last seven match-ups), the University of Alberta Golden Bears take the Oilers' Rookie team to school. Yuk yuk.

A question I'd like answered, is who is this Colin McDonald character and why hasn't anyone ever talked about him? Just minute, I'm going on a intranet search...

Okay, so of course Lowetide ran a nice little profile on him in July.

Cogliano played well as team captain, and he was pretty unhappy with final tally stating, "We should have won this one. I'm very disappointed with the results." From everything I hear (not being there in person) he stood out in skill and presence, but never converted his chances into goals. Let's hope he can find the missing pieces this coming week and into the pre-season games.

Anyway, since the Rookies won last year, I'm going to take it as a good sign that they lost to the Bears to open this season of Edmonton hockey. Can we get all our bad luck out of the way before regular season games begin?

Will Pisani be ready to play by Christmas?

Will eight guys have sudden miracle years?

Is it just me or are the walls beginning to close in?

Whatever. Good game UofA.

***UPDATE***

Everyone's favorite Grabia:Andy, has a great review of the game over at BoA. He even got to meet Bob Stauffer. The same Stauffer Georges Laraque likes to call "Bum". Don't ask me....

Hobbies include: Star Wars, Transformers, Nose Picking...

2007-09-10T15:15:00.001-06:00

Good catch by "cheeks" in Lowetide's comment section:

Off topic - but we are really scraping the bottom of the barrel in many positions - even goal. The Oilers have a 9 year old playing goal in the bears game tonight - Pitton ;-)

link

Sadly, this is almost believable. Stoic tears are allowed at this point.

Not to be outdone, the EIG proudly unveils the new Oilers jersey

2007-09-10T12:46:00.001-06:00

In your face, Calgary!

with a nod to CiO

So Many Sleeps Still To Go

2007-09-07T15:45:00.000-06:00

Everybody loves a panting dog.

In Oilers news...meh. Wake me up when bad things stop happening to this team.

But do go check out BDHS. Especially if you get offended easily.

Canada-Russia game on tonight. It's almost unbearable, isn't it? Like cheering on a mugging. Ah well, good for the boys and good for Sutter for doing us more than proud.

To sum up Russia's 6-2 loss to Canada:

2007-08-31T23:59:00.000-06:00

Poor Varlamov. Canada remembered his easy five-hole and kept right on slipping it in. He was replaced by Zhelobnyuk who gave up three himself. For about 15 minutes there it looked like Russia was going to compete despite the loss of Cherepanov for the rest of the series (concussion from the Sutter Steamroller).

What else can I say?

Game 4: 4am(MST) Saturday morning. TSN.

Through the haze, Canada victorious 3-0

2007-08-30T11:15:00.000-06:00

Notes from game 2:

Brandon Sutter is a monster. He's a force of nature on the ice. He completely destroyed Cherepanov early in the first and completely knocked the Russian off his game for the rest of the match-up.

Alexei Cherepanov shows up. Kind of. I'm sure he'd intended on making this outing his time to shine, but that Sutter hit left him sprawling on the ice with his helmet skittering away in the slush. He made a few decent moves, but I honestly think he was scared to be on the ice. A few very selfish moments with the puck, but that's been kind of a theme with Team Russia so far. They lack cohesiveness.

Kyle Turris. Whatever. He'll be a star. He's already the most dominant player on the ice in terms of foresight and skill, but he has a way to go yet before being able to translate his skills for the NHL level.

Sergei Bobrovsky in goal for the Russians actually did a really decent job. He was absolutely bombarded by scoring attempts and the fact that he held his team to just 3 in the hole is surprising.

Speaking of goalies, how confident was Jonathan Bernier? Coming way out to challenge forwards, shutting down holes, making casual glove saves without worrying about face-offs due to Canadian domination in that area. Not only did he tend well, he played a good psychological game as well.

Sam Gagner continued to be excellent, making great plays, setting up the puck, keeping cycles alive, causing turnovers, disrupting rushes. Samwise was everywhere, a thorn in the side of the Russians and dogging every play they tried to make. I'm actually pretty happy we drafted him. He may not end up being a star in the NHL, but he'll be a must have solid player. I never would have thought so six months ago, and apparently neither did Lowetide, but his game has expanded on so many levels in such a short time, I'll be following him a little more closely from now on.

David Perron obviously wanted to be a difference maker. He set up Turris for the first goal and potted one himself in a move that should make any highlight reel this week, and for the rest of the year. Keep your YouTube eyes open for that one.

Tucic, Marchand, Legein, etc...all had very good games. Basically I'm too lazy to continue.

Like I mentioned in the comments of the last post, there's something unsatisfying about the series so far. It's like watching hockey last spring with the Russian Team playing the part of the Edmonton Oilers. It's hard to see how they're going to win more than one or two games in the Series, but I hope they end up surprising me. A lot of it comes down to coaching. Sutter is a great coach by any standards, and if Team Canada is giving us a preview of the new face of the New Jersey Devils, then I pity the competition.

Next game: Tomorrow 6am MST on Sportsnet.

Maybe Omsk will be the city where it turns around for Team Russia. And maybe, just maybe, the air conditioning will work, so the kids won't have to play Degobah Swamp Hockey again.

Omsk is the red dot on this map that looks kind of like a prancing bull or something

Round 2, Ufa's Revenge

2007-08-28T18:21:00.000-06:00

Ufa's Coat of Arms ("Kill!" optional)

Well, on the day of Ufa's anniversary for... something important?, Canada handed the old industrial town a big old helping of humble pie. I'm willing to bet they want some revenge. Served Cold. Unfortunately for them, the temperature was sweltering inside the Ufa Arena. In fact, on Monday a thin mist could clearly be seen hovering above the surface of the slushy ice.

Could be that they've already begun to exact some hot vengeance (re: Gagner+groin+cheerleaders). If the Russian team wants to save face from the drubbing they took in Game 1 they're going to have to come back with guns blazing and shooting wrists at the ready. Who knows, maybe Cherepanov will even make an appearance this time around.

So, get to bed early - the game starts at 7am (MST) yet again. This time it's being broadcast on Rrrrrogers Sportsnet! Home of the "Sportsnet Talent" (are they still going with that?).

It may not be featuring Chris Tucker or Jackie Chan, but if you say it fast enough you'll groan with delight and disgust -but mostly disgust- at:

Russia R 2

Будет Днем Игры!

2007-08-27T00:44:00.000-06:00

Set your alarm clocks, call in sick, or just set the timer on your recorder.

TSN at 9am eastern

Catch it on TV or log onto their broadband broadcast of the game.

***UPDATE****

mikew over at Covered in Oil has an excellent game review up.

My Take:

It was a shaky start for Canada with two Russian goals in the first ten minutes, but they settled in and started laying the beat down, physically dominating the Russian team and netting a ridiculous 14 penalties.

I thought Ganger did a good job (1 assist, 1 goal) at holding his own and then some, making a slick play around defender Tulapov and going five-hole at a sharp angle against Varlamov. Before that, Kyle Turris lived up to expectations drawing a nice penalty shot through sheer effort and pulling a sweet Yzerman deke, you guessed it, five-hole. Later in the game he would try to knock down the boards with his face, but after some attention and a band-aid, he was back on the ice, lower lip swelling out to pugnacious proportions. Young Sutter was awesome on defense, silencing anyone who thought they'd caught a whiff of nepotism in the air, and looked like someone who killed penalties for fun. Meanwhile, Mason, though seemingly porous at the outset, got his head into the game and out of fantasies of Jessica Simpson (whom in a pre-taped interview mentioned he'd like to date because, as he so succinctly put it, "She's hot").

Cherepanov was effectively shut down and our guys adapted passably to the big ice. It'll be interesting to see on Wednesday if Canada can avoid playing an entire period's worth of minutes a man down.

Also: cheerleaders. Is nice!

"To _____,Your Friend, Wayne Gretzky 99"

2007-08-26T18:01:00.000-06:00

When you grew up in a non-hockey family, what did four Stanley Cups and running mean to you? Not much. It was great to talk about it with friends, "Oilers are awesome." "Yeah!" , but that's about where it ended.

I don't know exactly what her connection with him was, but my Grandma was on close enough terms with Wayne Gretzky that they spent time together and he came over for dinner, and all that old boring stuff. When you're a kid, anyone who hangs out with Grandma can't be that cool, after all. So when she got me a photo of him that he'd personalized, it went into my pile of junk in the closet.

I'd pull it out and look at it from time to time, and think I even hung it on the wall for a few months, but mostly it was hidden away in dark obscurity among old school papers and drawings of ufo's and robots fighting armoured dragons for dominion of earth. (And strangely, toothpaste. I used to draw an awful lot of toothpaste. Big, long trails of it squeezed out by some character who looked way too happy with himself... Let's not explore that.)

One afternoon, in a moment I regret to this day, I threw it all out.

Why? I have no idea. Maybe I was thinking I had to clear shit up in my room, maybe I thought I was getting too old for all that baby stuff, I don't know.

Grandma has since passed on, Wayne is in Phoenix and I'll never be as close to him again as I never knew I was in the 80's , and that small treasure that I didn't appreciate is forever gone, disintegrating next to a Garbage Pail Kid card and a little He-Man comic book detailing the history of Greyskull and the rise of Skeletor.

Lament.

New Trend: Proven Skill and Youth Valued over Marginal Competence and Age!

2007-08-25T11:19:00.000-06:00

Last night Lowetide put up a great post regarding the glut of older Free Agents still available. With young guys in the system able to do similar work at lower salaries, mid level players are finding it hard to either get work, or swallow enough pride to take massive pay cuts.

Matheson this morning:

Consequently Peca, who made $3.99 million with the Edmonton Oilers in 2005-06 and $2.5 million last season with the Toronto Maple Leafs, will make half that in Columbus.

Mirtle has been nerding out on the numbers for the past few weeks, but has upped his passion the past couple days, spreadsheeting and graphing and analyzing and opinionating.

So, are we getting Mike Johnson after all?

A Wii Confession

2007-08-24T19:25:00.000-06:00

To show you how stupid I was about hockey just under two years ago: I distinctly recall trying to make a case that we should trade Ales Hemsky and wash our hands of the matter.

"Oh sure, he can skate, but he never shoots!"

"He's too fancy, he's a nancy!"

"Ales? I mean...Ales!?"

I've eaten a lot of crow in the succeeding 20 months, and gladly. Hemsky will never be a huge leading scorer, in my developing opinion, but he's the type of guy who can set up other guys to succeed. I watched this year as more and more teams started focusing on the young Czech, making it a priority to shut him down. Can this be the year that he puts all the pieces together? The dingle meets the dangle? Do we have enough in shooters like Stoll, Souray, and Pitkanen to take full advantage of Hemsky's confounding loop arounds?

As always, I have questions but no answers.

I don't know what this year will bring, but every morning I'm a little more excited and eager to find out.

Old Laser Eyes

2007-08-24T18:50:00.000-06:00

Dwayne Roloson played 68 games last year, which was probably way too much. With Mathieu Garon as back-up I hope we see a lot less of Roloson in the coming months. He probably wants to play as many games as possible to keep in form, but he'll be 38 in October, and really, how much intensity can he keep up without some decent breaks here and there?

Anyway, if you want some deeper discussion on goaltending, check out Covered In Oil's continuing look at past tandems (and threesomes?) here.

Can You Smell It?

2007-08-24T13:15:00.000-06:00

Sweet Eye of Odin! Pre-Season games are only three weeks away! Training camp even sooner than that! And the Canada-Russia series starts in 3, count 'em three days.

Sniiifffff! Ahhh, Hockey Season begins anew. I've been practising all my cuss words and shouting "shoooot!" in the shower, and my sweet lady is excited about all the ranting she'll get to hear. Aren't you, baby?

Breathe in that autumn-ish air, go for a walk with the family, shell out $115 for a new jersey, and stock up the fridge. As tough a row the Oilers have to hoe this year, I doubt it's going to be dull.

What's that? You demand a tired metaphor? As you wish:

Man vs Machine

2007-08-23T16:14:00.000-06:00

For a guy like me who hasn't given hockey it's due for the past two decades, there's a huge learning curve involved. Only a year ago I was asking questions like: What's +/-? EV or ES? Why does PPG matter, aren't we just watching a game?

I started watching Hockey again at a great time, the beginning of the 05/06 season, right after the lock-out ended. At first, it was pretty confusing and I even bought Hockey for Dummies to help me wend my way through all the seemingly contradictory rules (believe me, if you don't know hockey, it appears pretty labyrinthine). But by Christmas I had a handle on all the rules and could even identify the players by the numbers on their backs.

I was hooked!

After the crazy SCF run in the spring I started logging onto Oilers blogs to keep that excitement alive over the summer. That's where I encountered something I love to hate, and pretty much hate that I'm starting to love it:

Stats. Statistics. The mathematical breakdown of blood, sweat and dreams.

I'm as guilty as everyone else this summer, looking at the math and seeing how it doesn't add up.

Guilty you say? Damn straight.

My crime is that I'm killing my joy. I'm snuffing out the flame of excitement that makes watching this great game so damned fun! I'm burying it in hard numbers and sober prognostications, seeing what has been, and like a jaded old bugger, assuming that it is what will be.

Well, screw that!

I'm here to have fun, not be right!

To me hockey is the chiclets on the ice, the pure adrenaline and pride of watching Matt Greene make one of the most beautiful first goals in NHL history. Shades of Bobby Orr in that one. The Hemsky goal we have on the sidebar is another one of those moments that are going to live with me for a long time. (Can You. Believe. What We. Just Saw!)

The Hot Oil competitions, the insight on these blogs, and the sense of cameraderie in a group of people who are even more obsessed than me...that's what I'm in it for.

So, I'll use the stats to keep myself abreast of what someone has done before, help me understand what kind of player they've been and make comparisons to other players - see what kind of road they might take in their career. And I'll leave it at that.

The real satisfaction for me is going to be watching a bunch of guys gel together, form a team, and battle all season long for each other and for us, the fans. Because under the stats and the contracts, these guys are just like anyone else: capable of surprising you.

After all, that's what it means to be human, doesn't it?

New Oiler Sheldon Souray with his family

Getting a Handle on Peca

2007-08-23T10:02:00.000-06:00

image: lowetide...and then altered with some cheesy photoshop

I'll be the first to admit it, knowing a lot about Mike Peca was never a priority for me.

He came to Edmonton in a trade for Mike York and a fourth rounder in 2005, but didn't 'show up' until the year was almost over, plus he can grow a beard and likes beans. In a different life he would have been a hobo. That's about all I know about Mike Peca. (and an unsubstantiated rumour that he's nuts for porn, or so claimed a certain unnamed informer who works at Shaw. I mean nuts)

So I was curious when reading Duhatschek this morning:

Naturally, Linden and Peca are not going to produce those sorts of numbers, but all the intangibles that they possess - primarily leadership and experience - can add a dimension to their respective clubs.

Leadership?

Turns out he was the alternate captain for the Gold Medal Team Canada win in Salt Lake City 2002, captained the NY Islanders And according to wikipedia, "twice won the Frank J. Selke Trophy for being the best defensive forward, in 1996-97 and 2001-02."

Who knew? (besides anyone who even casually watched hockey over the past ten years)

He was selected by the Vancouver Canucks round 2 #40 overall in the 1992 NHL Entry Draft (info: hockeydb) after a season in which he tore it up in the OHL:

Looking at his career numbers:

I can now understand why even after seeing him sit out an entire season (2000-01) due to a contract dispute with Buffalo, suffer a broken leg last winter and experiencing first hand his capability for lethargic play, Howson still decided Peca was worth over a million bones for a year of mercenary work (1.2 million bones, to be exact. Plus heavy incentives, which was, I think, a necessary move by the new Columbus GM).

They say you can't measure intangibles, and if some of the kids on the Blue Jacket's second or third line felt a sudden weight dropped from their shoulders on hearing of the signing, then I can't argue the point. Peca's still young enough at 33 to come out with a few more big years and it could be that this season -barring injuries- he get's back on track. Playing under Hitchcock's expectations it could be that Peca, and the Blue Jackets, will have a banner year.

"F*****ck!"

Da Oil!

2007-08-22T21:09:00.000-06:00

Hello my friends....welcome to the Oilblobosphere pre-season no-bullshit overview/rant. I'll try to keep the profanity to a bare f**king minimum but I might get carried away. First off, I AM an Oilers fan so my perspective might be a little slanted. Second, if you don't agree with me, then man up and post your own shit or shut up. Intelligent hockey talk is what's going on here. Lastly, let's not live in the past - I'm tired of hearing about Chris Pronger screwing some skid and he f**ked the team. Get over it.

Now, let me say that I'm pretty pumped about the Oil this year. We've got some pretty good talent and some of the old crew back too. Let's not start dishing out the expectations just yet - remember Lupul aka The next big thing and the poor kid never had his balls drop at all? The Penner move was brilliant. You can say what you want about Lowe, but at least he had the balls to go after a good, young player from the Stanley Cup champs. Up until this deal I actually liked Brian Burke a lot. It's too bad he started spewing all this shit about his supposed buddy Kevin Lowe. What an asshole he turned out to be.

Here's the two best moves Lowe made other than the aforementioned signing of Penner:

1) Garon- Here's an under-rated goalie that was getting shelled in LA and he can win 11 out of 15 games for the Oil and provide some much needed backup for an aging (but still excellent) Rollie. I like the guy and I think he'll be a better fit in Edmonton than many expect - and he's a good Canadian boy.

2) Pitkanen - We only got him inked for a year, but he could be the difference. With the spotlight and pressure on Souray, here's a guy that could really come in and make a difference on the blue line. A 1st round pick who can play 25+ mins a game and not bitch about it. I don't like his -25 rating from last season but hopefully Huddy can teach him a thing or two. Nuf sed.

I like Stortini. Since we lost Winchester to Dallas, who do we have (especially on the right wing) that can grind? Statistically he had a shit year, but -7 over 29 games for a rookie could have been a lot worse.

I'm still not 100% convinced we have a guy who can play with Hemsky. The guy had 40 assists last year and he would have had 60+ playing with Crosby.

Lastly, we've got Kelly "Go Wide" Buchberger coaching Springfield. Whatever. We've got a solid AHL francise that we can groom guys in. Don't under-estimate how important this will be for the Oil this year and Bucky is a better coach than you might think.

Dude out.

Hemsky, Stoll, the Show

2007-08-22T19:52:00.000-06:00

Spurred by a discussion over at Lowetide:

Hemsky is going to be one to watch this year. He's got nothing to lose and he's had a chance to stretch his legs and settle into a more mature role as a player. This just might be his break out year (knock on wood).

LT mentioned a healthy Stoll and I have to agree. He was setting the ice on fire while he was concussion-less last season. If he can get a little more control to balance his enthusiasm he's going to be an unpleasant player to square off against.

Our boys have been working hard, conditioning themselves well, and I can't help but think that there's going to be a lot of really phenomenal individual performances to look forward to this year.

A cold blooded death knell

2007-08-22T19:20:00.000-06:00

I guess what I'm trying to say here is that numbers count.

And mc79 counted 'em.

If you need me, I'll be drinking scotch. The good stuff.

***UPDATE***

Lowetide just put the nail in the coffin.

***DRUNK UPDATE***

Well, now that we know the worst, my question would be: What can we look forward to in the upcoming season? What will make it fun to watch, even though we lose our chance to compete in the post season?

Thoughts?